• MakeReady-Or-Not

    How To Play:

    Witch

    • Using a neighborhood approved selection method (engine, engine #9 — bubblegum, bubblegum in a dish, etc.) select The Witch.

    • Use the same method to select a Guinea Pig.

    • The remaining players are Runners.

    • The Witch leads The Guinea Pig away. (This should be terrifying.) The Witch hides The Guinea Pig — not on the garage roof. (This might be tempting. Don’t do it.)

    • The Witch gives (verbally) a list of tasks to The Guinea Pig — things like: A) Run around the house three times singing The Happy Birthday Song. B) Dig a hole, bury one June Bug in it. C) Fill a hat with decorative rocks from the neighbor’s garden, etc.

    • At this point, The Witch must call out “ready-or-not!” from wherever he/she is waiting/hiding.

    • The “tasks” given to the The Guinea Pig are meant to lure the Runners off their safe-base and into the waiting/hiding clutches of The Witch while searching for the hidden Guinea Pig.

    • When/if any Runners are caught by The Witch, he or she turns them into Another Guinea Pig. Meaning: They are hidden and given a new list of tasks for The Runners to complete.

    • When tasks are completed for a particular Pig, a Runner must free them by tagging. The Guinea Pig must run to the safe-base without being caught by The Witch.

    • If The Runners successfully free The Guinea Pig(s), they win the game.

    • If The Witch catches all of The Runners, she/he wins the game.

    * If someone wets their pants during course of play, a “time-out” should be called and fresh pants should replace wet pants.

    ————-

    In a bold (not really) and unprecedented (true) move, Zeichen Press will be offereing box sets of greeting cards that are not letterpress printed.

    Hold your applause until the end.

    We call this our Makeready Collection.

    Why?

    Letterpress printers (like us) need to test placement, packing, and color when printing something new. The same old piece of paper is printed on over and over again, resulting in an odd (and might I add, paranormal?) mishmash of goodness.

    Our Makeready Collection imitates this letterpress printing practice using a computer and some other kind of printing. (Offset)

    Here are the three designs: (Available for The New Year)bonnie-makeready-birthday-grab-blog-no-line bonnie-makeready-everyday-illus-grab bonnie-makeready-holiday-grab

    October 13, 2012
  • Your Marriage vs. The Zombie Apocalypse

    I’m not a lawyer or a scientist but I understand the importance of writing marital vows that contain language relating to soulless corpses.

    I know it’s not Zombie Season because the weather is cooler and I know the weather is cooler because the maggots in the garbage bin magically disappeared. The rash of zombie activity this Summer has inspired me to rewrite my vows — I simply cannot have my husband strip naked and eat my face on the turnpike.

    Give this card to newlyweds or oldyweds:till-undeath

    October 7, 2012
  • Mating Tips

    The only way to find out if you’re truly compatible with another is to spend a year together aboard a Portuguese fishing vessel.

    Unfortunately, that’s not always an option. Don’t spend another minute agonizing!

    Forget the touchy-feely Relationships aisle at Barnes & Noble or (gasp) your local library! Forget the $120/hour couples counselor! Forget mind-reading, unmet expectations, behavior prediction!

    Zeichen Press has created a $4.00 cheat sheet! love-means-green-revisedCollect them all (there’s only one) and store them safely in a polished mahogany box. Tabulated by topics, like: Division-of-Labor, Apology, and so much more!

    *A Mating Tip Card and a BB gun make the perfect wedding gift.

    October 3, 2012
  • Neglected Category

    My retirement plans are needy and demand an Airstream Trailercropped-airstream-trailer

    and a plot of land in Pigeon Forge, Tennessee — as close as possible to Dollywood.

    That would be fine as cream gravy.

    Yes, retirement — everyone does it differently. Some like to join communities in Arizona and some like to hoard cats. Hoard cats until one day they have a stroke, can’t get to the phone, die of starvation, and their beloved pets eat their face.

    But everyone is so different! And as my Grandma Shea used to say, “It takes all kinds.”

    So wise.retiring

    September 26, 2012
  • A Loon Call For Garrison Keillor And Hat Made of Money

    When I heard Jen was participating in the Loon Call Contest at the Prairie Home Companion Street Party, I said a quick prayer to Saint Genesius.

    I can’t believe she didn’t win. 

    Earlier that day, this angel—dressed in plain clothes—was spotted:money-hat

    If I wore a hat made of money, I’d have a faraway look in my eye, too.

    September 22, 2012
  • Eating My Weight In Vegetables

    Did you know that the Arboretum has a pick-your-own vegetable garden? The signs were more intuitive than posted.smuggling-vegetables

    My latest health craze (the last one turned out not to be a “health” craze) promises an upward trajectory of boundless energy and crisply firing synapses. Kale, spinach, green chard, cucumber, celery, lemon, parsley, and apple in one glass.

    In one glass.

    I’ve learned that a bagful of smuggled kale equals one thimbleful of juice.

    One thimbleful.

    I wonder how many ounces I would be if I were juiced. Note to self: Juicing bodies would make them easier to flush down toilet.

    Look at these beautiful Dahlias and forget everything I just said:anenome-dahliasunburt-dahliaWeren’t those lovely?

    All of the flowers and vegetables inspired a Father’s Day card:papa-grayer

    September 14, 2012
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  • COLOR ME IMPRESSED!

    Do you need ANOTHER thing to do this Holiday Season?

    YES, PLEASE.

    How about a COLORING CONTEST??

    But, Fran, how could I possibly fit this into my busy schedule??

    THAT’S EASY BECAUSE WE BROKE IT DOWN INTO STEPS!
    ~ Step 1: print this picture
    ~ Step 2: color the picture like your life depends on it
    ~ Step 3: take a photo of your colored masterpiece with your super smartphone OR scan
    ~ Step 4: send to info@zeichenpress.com ~ or snailmail to us
    Zeichen Press will choose the winner AND and that person will receive free cards!!! 

    color-mezeichen-press

    HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

    December 8, 2016
  • We want to be more than just friends with: i like you too

    i like you too -> 416 Snelling South Saint Paul, Minnesota 55105

    ANOTHER profile in that special series dedicated to bringing our readers biased reviews of shops that carry our goods.

    The gals  sarah-angela-i-like-you

    knew it wasn’t right to deprive the good people of St. Paul all of that hand-crafted goodness for one more minute. After all, they are THE purveyors of one-of-a-kind-locally-made-gifts.

    They remind me of me and Jen except Jen has way more tattoos and piercings. Some day you’ll be as cool as us, ladies. SOME DAY.

    They transformed i-like-you-too-paintinga blank canvas on Snellingne-i-like-you-too-space

    into something WORTHY ENOUGH to carry Zeichen Press cards.cards-at-i-like-you-too 

    And they have other cute stuff too. Or whatever.

    PS:

    color-i-like-like-you-new-card

    November 28, 2016
  • Custom Customer & Choirs of Angels

    Now that my fireplace is ready for Winter,fire-fall-2016

    Jen can finally print Holiday cards for our favorite custom customer.akustiks-chase-lock-up Akustiks is a fancy company of acousticians who design the architectural acoustics for theaters and concert halls.must-enjoy-winter-for-akustics

    And, correct me if I’m wrong, but a group of acousticians were actually hired by God to assure the residents of Bethlehem that His choir of angels sounded better than some music pouring out of the earbuds crammed in my earholes.

    Despite my lo-fi circumstances, I created a new card. Only 38 shopping days till Christmas!

    hark4

     

    November 18, 2016
  • House Calls

    Sometimes your web developerkelly-living-room-cropped

    has to come over and gnaw on bricks (gluten-free scones) and discuss dogs wearing sweaters so your mobile site can function properly.

    TECHNOLOGY.

    And Jen loves meetings because she’s a social butterfly jen-living-room

    and craves attention. Oh, Jen! When will it be enough??

    November 14, 2016
  • My Heart(h) Will Go On

    As my eyeball filled with blood,bloody-eyeball

    I thought to myself, “should I have someone redo my hearth,

    or stop working on our 2017 catalog?”

    2017-catalog-on-couch

    I decided to both because I’m an over-achiever.

    AND THEN I wrote a card

    winter-brought-back-2

    because it’s cheaper than therapy.

     

    November 10, 2016
  • Poop Sandwich vs. Soup

    top-of-mailchimp-blastI'm sorry life handed you that poop sandwich when you obviously ordered the soup.body-of-mailchimp-blastxo-mailchimp-blast

    November 3, 2016
  • Hello!

    October 26, 2016
  • Always happy, never mad.

    October 26, 2016
  • Loretta “Daredevil” Shea

    October 26, 2016
  • Behind The Scenes

    October 26, 2016
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