• TOPLESS WOMAN MOLESTED BY LOCAL SEAL

    Wellfleet, Massachusetts

    A Minneapolis woman dove into the icy Atlantic Monday morning in an attempt to “meet a seal”.
    Assuring onlookers that the attempt was an “act of diplomacy” she swam a distance of approximately 50 yards using a stroke known as the Dog-Paddle. She met the 350 pound Harbor Seal unaware that the top of her two-piece bathing swimsuit had become untied and dropped to her waist. The woman is reported to have said that the seal reacted to the introduction like “some sort of wild animal” … “His flippers were all over me.”

    July 22, 2009
  • Fran gets new glasses!

    Observe this medical marvel:fran-with-new-glasses-and-l1-450x337

    July 13, 2009
  • David Hasselhoff, Jerry Lewis, Zeichen Press

    The closest I’ve been to Australia is the Victoria’s Filet at the Outback Steakhouse in Blaine, MN (pop: 44,942). I’m not sure who to thank for introducing Zeichen Press to our Australian cousins. Maybe Ampersand Duck had something to do with it or maybe it was my grassroots advertising campaign. I stuffed (but first I drank) 1000 bottles of wine with Zeichen Press Cards and threw them into the Atlantic Ocean.

    Maybe one washed up on the shores of Melbourne because this showed up in their newspaper:sunday-age-450x277

    Our CanCards are their Object of Desire. Thank you, Australia.

    Someday I will visit you. And your kangaroos. And your boomerangs.

    July 10, 2009
  • Seven Pounds is the name of the movie not the weight of my head

    About a jillion years ago, I was contacted by some Hollywood set designer – she wanted to know if I had extra letterpress “JUNK JUNK JUNK” for a new movie starring Rosario Dawson and Will Smith. Wait. What?! Trembling, I clutched my Fresh Prince of Bel Air collection to my chest and replied, “Oh, that’s cool. Yeah, I could Fed Ex some stuff to you guys – I won’t charge extra for the dust.” (Followed by cool and knowing laughter). What a comfortable rapport! I was talking TO Hollywood. Maybe they’d ask me to audition for the movie! The movie… Maybe Rosario Dawson needed an understudy… or a body double?

    rosario-dawson-450x345

    We could be twins!judy-gets-a-bath

    I asked the set designer when they’d like to fly me out, explaining that my schedule was flexible enough to accommodate movie- shoots, sightseeing, and pool-parties. She told me she’d have her people call my people.

    ANYWAY, it turns out they were able to pull the set together without my JUNK JUNK JUNK and Rosario politely declined my offer — we’re still totally friends

    …So I finally watched The Movie last night. Ummm, Will Smith can fix my press anytime. Is that my review? Is that all I have to say? … Uhh, Rosario was convincingly ill and I bawled like a baby. There. Happy?? OH, and the garage-studio was super cute and perfect.

    PS: Strangely, Rosario’s character ALSO nicknamed her press The Beast. What?! c-and-p-shop-2012

    June 24, 2009
  • 96°

    I’m dripping with sweat. I’m marinating in sweat – the shop has got to be 100° . My head feels fuzzy… and my hands (are those my hands?) are leaving sweat-finger-prints on all the paper that I’m cutting.

    Wait, I smell barbecue chicken! Wait, maybe I’m on fire…. False alarm. It’s really chicken.

    So, I’m cutting paper in my bathing suit. I feel like I’m wearing a snowsuit in a sauna.

    I love summer. I’m not even kidding.

    June 23, 2009
  • Wanamingo

    My kitchen faucet broke (again) and as I crouched on the patio with the garden hose and plastic scrubby, my mind wandered to faraway lands. Specifically, Wanamingo, Minnesota. Oh, Wanamingo! Has anyone written an ode to thee? I was in Wanamingo today and overheard this “conversation” between a mother and child at the 60 Stop Gas Station:

    Child: “I  want eggs for breakfast.”

    Mother: ” You can’t get everything you want. I wanted flowers for Mother’s Day and I got nuthin’!”

    Oh, well. The REAL Wanamingo is full of chickens, barn cats, fictional alpacas and acres of hard-working folks that build chicken coops and excavate pig cemeteries – just for fun. These people walk around with just a hint of a smile, a smile that says, “I chop the logs to heat my house. I know how to grow potatoes. I know the difference between bush beans and pole beans.”

    They also spend the Winter trying not to recreate a scene from The Shining.

    I’M JUST SAYING.

    Okay, so maybe I don’t have what it takes to step off the grid and live like Ma Kettle. Maybe the closest I get to feeling the heartland is living with a broken faucet. Fetching water for cooking makes me feel like a barbarian.

    In between all my water fetching I made this :

    Cafe-Greeting-Cards-business-card-red-&-black

    It’s gonna be BIG people.

    BIG.

    June 13, 2009
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  • COLOR ME IMPRESSED!

    Do you need ANOTHER thing to do this Holiday Season?

    YES, PLEASE.

    How about a COLORING CONTEST??

    But, Fran, how could I possibly fit this into my busy schedule??

    THAT’S EASY BECAUSE WE BROKE IT DOWN INTO STEPS!
    ~ Step 1: print this picture
    ~ Step 2: color the picture like your life depends on it
    ~ Step 3: take a photo of your colored masterpiece with your super smartphone OR scan
    ~ Step 4: send to info@zeichenpress.com ~ or snailmail to us
    Zeichen Press will choose the winner AND and that person will receive free cards!!! 

    color-mezeichen-press

    HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

    December 8, 2016
  • We want to be more than just friends with: i like you too

    i like you too -> 416 Snelling South Saint Paul, Minnesota 55105

    ANOTHER profile in that special series dedicated to bringing our readers biased reviews of shops that carry our goods.

    The gals  sarah-angela-i-like-you

    knew it wasn’t right to deprive the good people of St. Paul all of that hand-crafted goodness for one more minute. After all, they are THE purveyors of one-of-a-kind-locally-made-gifts.

    They remind me of me and Jen except Jen has way more tattoos and piercings. Some day you’ll be as cool as us, ladies. SOME DAY.

    They transformed i-like-you-too-paintinga blank canvas on Snellingne-i-like-you-too-space

    into something WORTHY ENOUGH to carry Zeichen Press cards.cards-at-i-like-you-too 

    And they have other cute stuff too. Or whatever.

    PS:

    color-i-like-like-you-new-card

    November 28, 2016
  • Custom Customer & Choirs of Angels

    Now that my fireplace is ready for Winter,fire-fall-2016

    Jen can finally print Holiday cards for our favorite custom customer.akustiks-chase-lock-up Akustiks is a fancy company of acousticians who design the architectural acoustics for theaters and concert halls.must-enjoy-winter-for-akustics

    And, correct me if I’m wrong, but a group of acousticians were actually hired by God to assure the residents of Bethlehem that His choir of angels sounded better than some music pouring out of the earbuds crammed in my earholes.

    Despite my lo-fi circumstances, I created a new card. Only 38 shopping days till Christmas!

    hark4

     

    November 18, 2016
  • House Calls

    Sometimes your web developerkelly-living-room-cropped

    has to come over and gnaw on bricks (gluten-free scones) and discuss dogs wearing sweaters so your mobile site can function properly.

    TECHNOLOGY.

    And Jen loves meetings because she’s a social butterfly jen-living-room

    and craves attention. Oh, Jen! When will it be enough??

    November 14, 2016
  • My Heart(h) Will Go On

    As my eyeball filled with blood,bloody-eyeball

    I thought to myself, “should I have someone redo my hearth,

    or stop working on our 2017 catalog?”

    2017-catalog-on-couch

    I decided to both because I’m an over-achiever.

    AND THEN I wrote a card

    winter-brought-back-2

    because it’s cheaper than therapy.

     

    November 10, 2016
  • Poop Sandwich vs. Soup

    top-of-mailchimp-blastI'm sorry life handed you that poop sandwich when you obviously ordered the soup.body-of-mailchimp-blastxo-mailchimp-blast

    November 3, 2016
  • Hello!

    October 26, 2016
  • Always happy, never mad.

    October 26, 2016
  • Loretta “Daredevil” Shea

    October 26, 2016
  • Behind The Scenes

    October 26, 2016
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