Zeichen Press

Category: Holiday

  • A Dog’s To-Do List -AND- Other Important Things

    One year, theEaster Bunnyput a tiny white bunny in our Easter basket. I was sure it was meant for me and not for the other kids that shared my home and parents. An outdoor cage was built and the bunny lived in it until and my memory gets fuzzy at this point the bunny went to live with the Easter Bunny again? Yes, I think that’s what happened.

    I don’t remember how I got it, but I also had a durable green parakeet. I usually forgot to clean her cage and the droppings rose like stalagmites from the newspaper-covered floor.stalagmite

    We never had a dog, although my grandparent’s dog tried to make me his wife. That was pretty traumatizing.

    Last weekend, I was surrounded by six small dogs. I loved it so much, I made a new card:dog-to-do-listOh,AND the Important Thing?We got cards intoPaper Source. It’s about time you noticed us, you big lug. (Paper Source has 63 shops around the country. Thats 63 x something x $ = $$$$)

  • Taking (A Fearless Moral) Inventory

    Jen told me that she is learning to master Quickbooks. I trust her.jen-puzzle

    I bet that the Quickbooks tutorial requires puzzle completion before you really get into the meat of the applicationjust to make sure the user is nimble-minded.

    The New Year is upon us and to celebrate I stood on a chair, my head surrounded by asbestos wrapped pipes, and counted envelopes.fran-counting-inventoryJen said this was calledtaking inventoryand while I am familiar with this as a spiritual concept, with a priest andconfessionalhandy, I was easily distracted because the priest and confessional were replaced by the dog and a bin of Bazooka bubble gum.one-dog-named-milliebazooka-binThese items were not on Jen’s listjen-inventory-listbut I think that was a potentially expensive oversight. Just to be on the safe side, I counted one dog named Millie and 34 pieces of Bazooka.

    You’re welcome, Jen.

  • Fortune Teller, Tell My Fortune

    Winter has been creeping in like a gas leak and I am always pleasantly surprised to find myself awake in the morning.It would not take long for the madness of Winter to descend upon the little house. Letterpress printed on recycled paper. Comes with coordinating envelope and packaged in cellophane sleeve.

    “That’s nice.”I say, as I stretch and crawl off my sofa-bed.Never one to miss nuance, I wonder why I’m not in my own bed.

    Good design sometimes requires getting into character – I’ve been dressing like a gypsy (not showering) for our latestTanekproject. A paper fortune teller is easier to mail than a crystal ball and some might argue – more accurate. Tanek will send 300 of these out to their dearest friends – I only hope they take the responsibility of predicting the future seriously:

    fortune-teller-1fortune-teller-5 fortune-teller-2 fortune-teller-3 fortune-teller-4fortune-teller-6

  • You Can Take the Girl Out of Minnesota

    The odyssey began exactly three and a half miles West of the Mississippi during what would later be called “Friday.” No need for an alarm to be set because rising at 4am comes so naturally to me – getting a jump on the day makes me feel like a dynamo.

    First legs of journeys are often fueled by earnestness and without vigilance, that fuel can turn to ennui. (ahn-wee)fran-ennui

    Ennui can turn to desperation and when mixed with starvation, can lead to tragedy. Remember the Chilean rugby team? Their plane crashed in the Andes and they ate each other. Survival and cannibalism are in cahoots, everyone knows that.

    Our airline didn’t want that blood on their hands so they loaded us up with a rib-sticking breakfast.

    coffee-cookie-airtran

    Our plane did land safely on the ground and we were stuffed into a sweat lodge/taxi-cab that smelled like thousands of weary travelers. (Curry + pine tree + urine).

    I don’t remember my own birth but I bet it felt similar to exiting the taxi – the crying, the relief, the hotel cradling me in it’s arms.

    Like good tourists, we went right from the hotel to the subway. Now I know that when I go to Purgatory (and I know I will) it will look, feel, and smell like the subway.

    It will make heaven even more glorious.

    manhattan-night

    Because traveling underground on a train isn’t strange enough, the subway was filled with hundreds of boozed-up Santas.

    santa-subway-2

    santa-subway-1

    And because my touristy feet were killing me, I had to go to the T.J. Maxx on Wall street to buy slippers. I did see the Occupy Wall Street people and asked them if they wanted to occupy T.J. Maxx with me but they (all five of them) looked at me like I was crazy.

    occupy

    Oh, we also walked across the Brooklyn Bridge. Has anyone seen that thing? It’s pretty cool and people should really be aware of it.

    fran-and-lucy-brooklyn-bridge

    Don’t I look serious? I didn’t crack a smile all day.

     

  • Farewell, No Coast OR Joy For Sale

    It’s hard to put a price tag on joy and laughter, but we did: $10.

    Actually, four cards for $10. This, and Jen not wearing a top, made our shoppers more giddy than usual.

    The Zeichen Press booth was a beacon of laughter bobbing in the sea of wrist-warmers, nose-rings, and ironic Christmas sweaters.

    no-coast-1 no-coast-2

    I hid behind our card racks for two days and talked to Jen about important things like iron lungs and Santa Clause while our customers snort-laughed (my favorite kind of laugh). There was even a gal that was laughing so hard she had to stamp her foot on the floor. Those responses made me feel like this:

    beaker

    And I think Jen felt like this:

    dr-bunsen

    Finally, a man came up to us and told us all about human exoskeletons. (See blog post #390:Freak-Magnet) Eventually, he rode away on a unicorn.

    What I guess I’m trying to say is that the No Coast Craft-O-Rama was, once again, awesome.

    PS: No show would be complete without a little danger and ours came in the form of an icy, yet beautiful, drive home.

    lakestreet-snow-carwash-sign lakestreet-snow-arbys-sign

  • I DON’T MEAN TO BE PUSHY

    Yes, I do.

    That festive, urban craft fair (theNo Coast Craft-O-Rama) is coming up this weekend and if you’ve never been, I will describe it to you:

    Have you ever legally died and felt yourself being drawn into the comforting white light?

    It’s just like that, only better.

    Think Holiday Bazaar. Just kidding. Don’t think that. Think table after table of handmade goodness, guaranteed to provoke gasps and tears of joy.

    To get ready for the show, I made these prints for our wall:no-coast-print

    And Jen did everything else.

    Also, I am thinking about getting my hair done.

  • Are we there yet?

    Christmas is just around the corner and that can only mean one (or more) thing(s): The shop is closed and the kitchen is open.

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    ALSO, it means that the children and animals are underfoot (more than usual) because of the 5 foot snowdrifts blocking the exits. snow-out-shop-window

    But don’t worry if you haven’t sent (or bought) your Christmas cards, yet! We (Jen and I, mostly Jen) are here to hold your hand straight through this blustery season! Did you know that (legally) you can send “Christmas” cards until January 6? THAT, is the official end of the Christmas Season because that’s when the Wise Men hauled it to the manger.3-wise-men

    *Playmobile dramatization.

    I used to mark the end of the Christmas Season by my son’s birthday (February 7). That day meant it was time to shove the Christmas tree out the second story window before the arrival of the birthday party guests.Nowthe tree stays until it becomes a fire hazard, and not a moment longer.So responsible!

    So, speaking of an Epiphany: Don’t waste another minute reading this scatology! Go and buy someSeasonal Cards!

    Are we there yet? Letterpress printed on recycled paper. Comes with coordinating envelope and packaged in cellophane sleeve.

  • Snow on Snow on Snow

    Ummmmmmmmmm… it’s, like, snowing.

    We tried to venture out in it today but then we saw this:blizzard-2010

    And this:snow-plow-in-ditch

    That’s a snow plow in a ditch on the side of the highway.

    Now we’re doing our Christmas shopping sans danger from ourcomputer-you can too!

     

  • The strong would survive the winter. The weak would, of course, be eaten.

    the-strong-would-survive-th

    The Long Winteris the true tale of a Minnesota family surviving one of the most brutal Winters in our recorded history. Trapped in the house – day after day after day – the blizzard makes it impossible to see out the window or even walk out to the barn without getting lost. Good ol’ Pa rigs up a rope to follow, he is always coming up with some creative solution! Ma follows that rope because Pa finds himself trapped in a ditch by the creek. The wood pile dwindles to nothing and the family is forced to twist hay into little bundles – they would burn these in the cast-iron stove to heat their little house. … Tough, brown bread is the only food left to eat.

    Or is it?

    What if that was on the jacket flap? I’d totally read that book.

  • It’s time for Christmas rejects!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5SH1j1luFOw&feature=related

    Gosh, that’s a scary movie! Those poor misfit toys… the choo-choo with the square wheels, the pistol that shoots jelly, the effeminate jack-in-the-box… I think the jack-in-the-box and that little dentist-elf would make a cute couple.

    Okay, so I keep trying to design something to print on these FIVE THOUSAND BEVERAGE COASTERS that we have lying around. I guess no one cares about preserving the shine and luster of their finished furniture.

    I think that’s barbaric.

    Maybe they think it sends the wrong message? I don’t. I think it’s perfectly acceptable to booze it up through the 12 days of Christmas. In fact, it is acceptable all year round IF you set your drink on one of our beverage coasters. (Was that some sort of plug?? Yes.Here’s a link:AND here’s one I designed just forTouchpoint Retail. It has the recipe for a candy cane martiniright on it.Isn’t that handy??coaster-for-touchpoint-450x229

    They decided to go with a card design from the Zeichen Press line but JUST TO BE DIFFICULT (I mean,sui generis.) they had us print it on an oversized SQUARE coaster. But I must admit, it’s pretty darn nice.

    touchpint-coaster-card-fron

    touchpoint-coaster-card-bac