Zeichen Press – Page 11 – Design & Letterpress for the people.

If your parents REALLY loved you

they would have me design a super sweet invitation for an important event in your life.�IF they REALLY loved you they would call me on the phone and say, “Hey, Fran! My name is Mr. Blee-Blah-Blah! I would like to demonstrate my love for my child by paying you to artistically interpret an upcoming event. �Your design savoir faire is the ONLY match for the depth of love I have for my child. They have a (insert important event) coming up. Let’s do this.”�

CLICK.

I’m just saying.

We created the following Bat Mitzvah invitation for a family that clearly knows how to express their love:

March 31, 2009
Room & Board & Me & Jen & Kangaroo Meat

Ding! Round two!

Meeting with Room & Board this afternoon. If all goes according to my master-plan* R&B will bite the inside of their cheeks to stifle their sobs of awe when I reveal The Prints. To diffuse the awesome aura, I will hand out sunglasses. Personally, I think inked antique type is as delicious as kangaroo meat from First Course.

YES. kangaroo meat.�

Round one for Room & Board ended up being a creative exercise – I know, I know. My Reward Will Be In Heaven. I produced some cutey cutes for Children’s Rooms. I dug down deep into that soft part of my heart – it was under a layer of small pebbles – and found these: I call them Franimals:

*master-plan: do not get lost driving to Room & Board HQ.

March 26, 2009
fancy-talk

Dahhhhhhhhhhhhhling!

You simply must see the latest thing! Diamonds are so last week and pearls are so last century.�Resin and metal is H-O-T! I hate to muddle-up the Natural Order of the Universe (no, I don’t) but we simply couldn’t say no to�Ampersand Designs�suggestion of collaboration!

We already sat side-by-side in the�Oscar Luncheon�gift bags – and – although opening the gift bags caused a face-melting scene ala Raiders of the Lost Ark,�we decided to combine our chocolate with their peanut butter for a super-sweet fashion-statement.

Buy one or ten today!

March 18, 2009
I ? NE + Downtown + Scott Parkin + Stephen Lynch + Rod Cone + David Josefsberg

Dear Diary,

Last night was ever so much fun! I went to a party and got a lock of everyone’s hair for my scrapbook. My art was hot glue-gunned to the wall by Jen.

Oh, Jen… will she ever settle down? She wore a short little dress and MOTORCYCLE BOOTS!! She’s trouble. See her little tiny head?:

The young man that sold me my dress failed to tell me that it also doubled as a shirt.

I blame him for the indecent length.

I also blame him for climate change, hiccoughs, Christopher Reeve’s “accident”, and my parents break-up.

~

There were so many tasty bits about that party. Jocelyn’s food and drink was dee. lish.us.

�Scott Parkin‘s street-level office was cooler (and cleaner) than anything I will ever own.

Maybe that’s why he asked me to stand by the door.

And sit in a highchair.

Studio on Fire displayed their goodness on the West Wall. And by that I mean, Ben Levitz stood nude on a chair in front of the West Wall. It wasn’t the least bit uncomfortable. Something about the beard made him seem fully dressed.

Part II of the evening was jam-packed full of comedy. Stephen Lynch�was gracious enough to give us front row seats to his show. Um, I don’t think I’ve laughed this hard since he came to town last year. AND did you know that The Hilton grills up Steak Bites for hungry travelers after midnight? Well, they do. We ate them and laughed at Rod Cone.

Or was it the other way around?

BUT there was one thing we all could agree on: It would be better to lose an arm than have your face chewed off by a chimp.

AND never wrestle a Praying Mantis.�

Oh, and somehow during the course of the evening, this happened:

Oh, Diary… what will tomorrow bring?!

March 14, 2009
You crazy kids and your YouTube!

I know everyone is DYING to see me operating my big-ass press.

Will wonders never cease?�I love you, Internet.

March 14, 2009
COME-N-GIT YER LETTERPRESS

Shu-OOT!! It’s a letterpress extravatacularasm!! This Freitag is gonna be all monster-truck-jam but with no trucks, no face-tattoos, and no NASCAR jackets. WHAT?! How can THAT be any fun?! Don’t tell Scott Parkin but I’m planning to ride in through the double doors and right over his conference table on my pimped-out ATV.�It’s gonna kick so much ass.�

So, it’ll be ME, JEN,�MR. BEN LEVITZ … and I’m sure he’s got some sort of gun-toting design gang. I’ll be wearing a full Kevlar dress, so I’m not even worried. The thing about Kevlar is that it’s light and airy. Just like me.

So, pack your saddle-bags with hard-tack and whiskey, shave your legs, and kiss yer ma’ goodbye – you’re goin to Northeast Minneapolis. Oh, Northeast Minneapolis… so… artsy, so… much… like… Uptown… wishes… it… were… still…

::The Dirty Details::

March 10, 2009

HAPPY THANKSGIVING

Much to be thankful for this year… Jen and I have FOUR working�lungs,�DreamWorks Studios�loves us, AND (fingers crossed) Tib is pregnant again.�

November 27, 2014
Big Dreams

Last night, I dreamt I took a day trip to Manitoba. Just an afternoon of pool-swimming at an area motel. I came home and bragged to everyone, “I went to Manitohhhba today.”Two observations:

1) No wall-less public toilet in this dream?? That’s right. Who’s in charge now, Dreams??

2) My dreams have finally taken me to Canada…

AND ANOTHER THING: Winter came completely out of nowhere this year. One week it was 71�, and the next week, I had to break out the Smartwool.�“Oh, Minnesota! You are so crazy! Potholes and moquitoes and icehouses!”

Shut up.

November 25, 2014
I DO Believe!

Our four desks were pushed together for a Thanksgiving art project; we wrapped bits of Autumn-colored tissue paper around the end of No. 2 pencils, carefully dipped the wrapped end into the puddle of Elmer’s Glue squirted onto a scrap of construction paper, and placed the florette onto the the inside of the outline of a turkey. 1…2…3… Ten seconds for each one to dry and the process to start all over again.

What a perfect time for my�4th grade�teacher to join us!

Conversation was breezy but quickly turned to talk of Christmas presents… Boy Student, “Can you believe that I believed in Santa Clause until I was in SECOND GRADE!” Laughter from the table… Laughter fades… MY TEACHER confides in the little group, “You guys, don’t laugh � I believed in Santa Clause until I was in�FOURTH GRADE!”

Hmm, *I*�believed in Santa Clause until that very moment. 🙁 <–Frowny Face

OH, BUT WHY DOES LIFE HAVE TO BE SO PEPPERED WITH DISILLUSIONMENT??

Fast forward 33 years,�DreamWorks Studios

just ordered 400 of THIS card.Sooo, there’s that or whatever.

November 18, 2014
WRAPPED IN BACON???

Just imagine�this:

in a Witch or Hobo costume,�“Trick or Treat!”

I was never�Wrapped in Bacon�like these fancy L.A. kids… Our�L.A. rep�sent us this:I’m assuming this little person was Trick-or-Treating… But I see no treat bag, nor do I see a 3-ring binder, NOR DO I SEE the latest issue of The Watchtower.

True story: Since�I�put�my�NO SOLICITORS card on the front door, I have had, exactly, zero solicitors.�Buy yours today!

November 11, 2014
Storm Windows and Firewood and New Cards

And maybe a pregnant cat.

Don’t say anything. JUST DON’T. Tib might have snuck out the window like some sort of wild teenager. We’ll know as soon as we catch her in the kitchen with a tub of Ben & Jerry’s.

In other (less controversial) news from the Zeichen Press Headquarters: The new cards are all printed and�in the shop! Wanna see?

November 5, 2014
Orange Is the New I’m Back

Life is like the murky end of our lake and you’ll have to dump in a 10 lb. bag of Aquacide Pellets if your mom isn’t there to rake the weeds away.

What is she talking about?

Don’t act like you don’t know.

Do you need a Congratulations-ish card?

You do?!

October 28, 2014
Forward, march!

It only took a few minutes to have a mole removed last week (my chest tube scar needed a BFF) and I texted Jen when it was done, exclaiming my relief at the speediness of the procedure.

She told me that that was the easy part.

That’s the way our relationship works � I get my head all full of smells of burnt flesh and joy, and Jen tethers my helium balloon to the doorknob.

It works. IT WORKS.

It’s time, once again, to print cards for the new release.

Choosing a corresponding envelope color can be difficult, and when Lucy or Loretta are unavailable we use another neutral third party.See how intense she is?

SETTLE DOWN, DINAH.

PS: You know we didn’t win Martha’s American Made Award competition. Stop asking.

October 20, 2014
Now What?

We find out on Friday if Martha is adopting us � I already packed my bags. I told Jen to pack hers but I don’t think she heard me as she was pealing out of the driveway with her windows rolled up.�Oh, Jen!

We (Jen) started printing the new release today, and to celebrate, Millie left Jen a present right in front of Zeichen Press HQ.It only seemed appropriate that this card be printed first:

The rest of the week (until the adoption), we (Jen) will be printing all of the new cards:

October 14, 2014
Dim Lights at the End of Dark Tunnels

I see it! October 13th is the Dim Light at the End of the Dark Tunnel… The Big Day.

The last day to vote for us.

Despite my well documented crippling�math anxiety,�I’ve done some calculations:�4 days of�voting remaining�x 6 votes per day = 24 votes per person.�

You better double-check that number/go vote! <–That’s the link!

October 10, 2014
Feeling the Love

I barely wept with gratitude when I found out Minnesota Business Magazine wanted to write about Zeichen Press for�Martha Stewart’s American Made competition… And when Minnesota Business Magazine writer,�Erica Rivera, told me to hush my pretty mouth so she could interview me, I did hush my pretty mouth. I do as I’m told. I DO.

Anyway, Erica wrote�this masterpiece:

And then I scooped the litter box.

AND here’s a page about litter boxes from my STILL UNSOLD book:

October 3, 2014