Thanks to buzzfeed quizzes, examining my conscience is so much easier. And shouldn’t we all ask ourselves those tough questions this time of year? ”If I were a pizza, what kind would I be?” Or, “Do I prefer Miley Cyrus from her Hanna Montana days or on a Wrecking Ball?”
But what is a life if it’s not examined? Not picked apart? Not squeezed like an engorged tick in a ziplock baggie?

I make cards between all of this productive introspection. Sometimes fictional creatures are harmed. Sometimes, they are spared.
Merry Christmas Eve-Eve!
More to come…
Oh, the cats? Never mind those. This place is crawling with them.
Fine, here’s this year’s Christmas tree.

See you there!
Two observations:





YOU MUST REALLY BE SUFFERING!



(I was just as stoic as the woman in the above illustration while they performed my surgery. Eyes wide open, no tears.)
But I’ll do it for you, reader, because I’m a giver. A GIVER.


“
(WARNING: The above image IS NOT AN ACTUAL BUTTON, MOM)

How could I have been so blind for so long?!
