Zeichen Press – Page 15 – Design & Letterpress for the people.

World Domination Is Safe And Easy

And it can be done from the comfort of your own home!

If you’re like me (don’t worry, you’re not) you don’t like to “leave” your house or “go” anywhere.

Don’t worry!

World Domination will be yours as long as you have these three things:

1) Wi-Fi

2) Computer

3) Forever Lazy Suit

We just picked up a new rep for the Virginia and West Virginia territories (that’s right, TERRITORIES. Like a gang.)

We are excited to welcome him aboard!

And we hope we don’t scare him away with our love for�Franimals�and wine.

February 21, 2013
The Importance of Wine and Kittens on the Interweb

There IS a universal language on the World Wide Web and understanding it only requires the appreciation of three things:

1) Kittens

2) Wine

3) Talking dogs

Also, videos where guys get kicked in the nuts � but those existed before YouTube.

I follow the dog around the house with my iPhone and I plan on kicking a guy in the nuts this week.

My life is all kittens and wine, so I was able to create the following:�

Feel free to share that 1,000,000 times.

And here’s a new card:�It’s a true story.

February 17, 2013
The mysterious mating practice of the praying mantis, AND YOU!

Ah, romance!�One couple might choose dinner and a movie… Another couple might choose post-coital cannibalism.

February 15, 2013
Mirror, Mirror On The Wall

Who’s the fairest one of all?

There is SO much happening around here! First, I had to bait a squirrel trapto catch the�Kitchen-Squirrel. I was going to fill the trap with my�kitchen garbage�(her favorite) but I decided to go for something more bourgeois: Skippy Peanut Butter.

And then there was a serious decision to make: Which card would Paper Source like more?I hope we chose wisely because one of our lives (Jen’s) is on the line.

Oh, and I didn’t forget that it is Valentine’s Day today, I am very romantic. Here is proof:

February 14, 2013
Meat Suits And Building A Fan Base

For Immediate Release:�In an attempt to build the Zeichen Press Fan Base, Jen Shea and Fran Shea will�appear on a local cable-access show locked in a cell and covered in Fancy Feast�. 1,000 cats will be released into the cell through a small hatch. Fran and Jen will sing a medley of famous duets, including�Islands In the Stream,�Endless Love, and�You Don’t Bring Me Flowers.

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February 10, 2013
Inspiration Constipation Frustration

I’ve been told that life is full of challenges. And I’m sure that, someday, I’ll encounter one. I hope it’s not a shipwreck or banishment. …I will probably contract the Ebola Virus.�I designed a card for myself in preparation.

Oh, but here’s a more “buyable” card for those of us that need encouragement:

February 5, 2013

Adventures In Letterpress!

When I was 18 years old, a friend and I drove her crappy car to the Superior National Forest for an event. I didn’t have my driver’s license so I only drove half way. The event was called�The Rainbow Gathering�and was full of fascinating (high and naked) people.�Highlights of the trip: Sitting in a tent all night with a group of strangers and not getting raped. And I think some other things happened but I’m not sure if they were real.

Aren’t subcultures fascinating??

Brandon Mise studied Letterpress Printers Around The World and made a book:�Adventures In Letterpress:AND he put a Zeichen Press project in it! It was that 4-color halftone/impossible feat of letterpress printing that we made for the�Tanek�Christmas card one year:Remember that? Little Nat and Ken sitting on scary Santa’s lap??�Did that event really happen??�Shhhhhhh, don’t speak or everyone will know how simple-minded you are.

March 17, 2014
Website Hijacked By Syrians

It’s true!

Our site was down for most of the week and the pirates wouldn’t restore it until serious demands were met. Jen had to “marry” the pirates and I had to write more birthday cards for our Spring Release.

March 8, 2014
I’ve Done All The Things

I’ve had 120 fires, watched everything (worth watching) on Netflix, eaten BONE-BROTH soup (like a caveman), changed my Smartwool socks 4 times…

Oh, and WROTE A BOOK.

Here’s the new cover with working title. (Isn’t that what people say??)

But I always try to find the deeper meaning behind hardship, and 45 sub-zero days equals hardship. AM I RIGHT??

Maybe I’m supposed to let the Winter inspire more cards?

February 26, 2014
SO NEEDY

Sheila and Franz Ferdinand�begged me to write a Zeichen Press card about their love because they’ve been together for over five years. I thought for sure she would have left him when his hair-plugs were rejected by his fussy scalp, but the toup�e looked so lifelike!You still have time to�order a card for Valentine’s Day!�Or two, if you are having an affair.

February 4, 2014
Mini-Ice Age

That’s right! Scientists have analyzed data and�determined that it’s extra cold.

Now I feel even less bad for never leaving my beanbag nest with fireplace view.I gave up working-out and have adopted a restorative yoga practice. This particular pose is called Corpse.Note the Winter coat. My character froze to death on the prairie.

ANYWAY. I can act like this now because I’m an eccentric writer with A LITERARY AGENT.

28 pages down, 12 to go…

January 26, 2014
Voodoo Doll

I started getting�acupuncture�this weekbecause my qi [chee] is obviously messed up. And, everyone knows, it is impossible to write a book with messed-up qi [chee].

A BOOK?!

I’m writing A BOOK!! Remember??

It’s one of the four things I talk about, so it should be easy to remember.

But, what are the other three?

1) Bacon

2) Rat-kingsAnd 3) My new nephewHere’s a card that explains everything:Right??

January 17, 2014
Out of the depths I have cried to Thee

Two important things happened this week:

1) It was so cold that I never left the house.IT FELT LIKE -49�.

OKAY, cover your ears:�THAT’S BULLSHIT.

All I could possibly do is sit in front of the fire with my companion, Tib The Cat.Oh, yeah, and here’s number

2) I GOT A LITERARY AGENT.

You heard me.

The Steinberg Agency�� they rep people like Tim Gunn and Cris Carter. NO BIG DEAL.

They want a 40-page picture book for adults…

*I*�like pictures.

*I*�am an adult.

I can make that book.

Here’s a teaser/the cover OF MY BOOK.

January 10, 2014
With An Awl And Some Brandy

I heard a story about a Minnesota fur trader.�

Tromping through the snow in seasonably cold weather, sans Northface�winter gear and, more importantly, SANS Smartwool socks � he found his feet to be frozen solid.�Frozen like a forgotten chuck roast buried under the pile of pizzas and popsicles.

What did he do?

Simply dragged his body through the snow until warmish accommodations were reached, asked the hardy men in the room for an awl,�punctured his feet, and had those same hardy men pour brandy over his numb tootsies.

There. Feet saved.

I didn’t write a card about that. (I’m sure I will.) Here’s something more lighthearted:

January 4, 2014
The Ruminator (2013 edition)

2013 was a doozy!

I daydreamed with such�intensity!

Such intent!

Such fervor!And I can’t speak for Jen (just kidding, I will. Right now.) but I’m pretty sure she has been�on pins and needles JUST WAITING for cards from me in her inbox.�(Between the printing, billing, and shipping.)

I also can’t speak for�The First Intern, and now�The Virtual Intern, but I will say that their lol’s have fueled my asbestos-covered furnace.

So, as I sit here, wearing layers of long underwear, under an Indian blanket (soaked in smallpox), staring out the window… I am beyond grateful for the ladies that make Zeichen�Press more than just a daydream.

And now I’m all choked up!

But enough of that!

December 31, 2013
Alright, Fun’s Over

Christmas is SO two days ago and that leaves me wondering what to do with the rest of winter.

Should I:

A) Take up a�winter sport, like: crying? Or swearing? Or punching the air?

B)�Write/design cards�about this wonder-filled season.

I choose both!

December 27, 2013