• A Thank You Card From Fran Shea’s Cat Ranch

    Oh, BOTHER!

    One more kitten needs adopting.

    AND how about this card?

    BECAUSE ALL I EVER THINK ABOUT IS CATS.

    Help. Me.never said thank you.cat

    June 24, 2015
  • Oh, how do you say… letterpress?

    Kids (like mine) graduated last week,HeGradhouses were open, cards (stuffed with money) were given… And I realized, THESE KIDS NEED THANK YOU CARDS.

    And always the giver, I made this:mare see bow coo.2I forced my son to read this handy blog post about proper thank you note writing.

    You’re welcome.

    June 10, 2015
  • NEW CARDS!!!

    LAUGHING THROUGH OUR TEARSHEAVEN IS A GARBAGEWE HAVE NEW CARDS!

    TWELVE OF THEM!

    Meat suits,

    tuna-filled mice,

    hungry wolves.

    AND SO MUCH MORE!

    Have a look!

    June 3, 2015
  • Letterpress For The People

    Tib mouthed these words while she nursed her latest brood:

    To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow,

    Creeps in this petty pace from day to day,

    To the last syllable of recorded time;

    And all our yesterdays have lighted fools

    The way to dusty death.

    Out, out, brief candle!

    Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player,

    That struts and frets his hour upon the stage,

    And then is heard no more.

    It is a tale Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,

    Signifying nothing.tib stoicDo you see what I’m working with here??

    She just gives and gives AND GIVES.

    Ah, suckle away…IN CASE OF EMERGENCY

    May 20, 2015
  • NO SOLICITORS + boing boing

    But, what IS boing boing??

    JUST AN AWARD-WINNING ZINE, BLOG AND DIRECTORY OF WONDERFUL THINGS.

    And a mention from them made me almost choke to death on my pb&j.gareth door bacon(That’s Gareth‘s door. And peephole.)That's better.BRANWYN
    Need your own card?? BUY HERE!!!

    May 13, 2015
  • We want to be more than just friends with: Treehaus

    Treehaus -> 3153 Glendale Blvd. LA, CA 90039

    ANOTHER profile in that special series dedicated to bringing our readers biased reviews of shops that carry our goods.

    AM I BIASED because Meesh (SP?!) said I was her favorite person?? TREEHAUS IS THE BEST SHOP EVER CREATED. There. I said it. What’s done is done. She has spoken.

    I will visit you Treehaus… someday… And on that day, people’s hearts will be filled with gladness and their mouths will proclaim the goodness of all things boutique.

     

    May 12, 2015
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  • A Blessed Event

    Mawage.

    Mawage is wot bwings us togeder tooday. Mawage, that bwessed awangment, that dweam wifin a dweam…princess-bride-mawidgeAccording to TMZ, Kanye and Kim just got engaged. (Awww). Kanye rented out a baseball stadium, hired an orchestra to play Kim’s favorite song, got on one knee and presented her with a 15 carat diamond ring.

    Is that all?

    I think the space shuttle is rentable. So is Lana Del Ray. And so are all of the South African diamond mine workers.

    I expect more from Kanye.

    I’ll send him this card.proposing

    November 3, 2013
  • With Eyes Closed And One Hand Tied Behind My Back

    There has been much debate and fury over genetically modified food.

    But what about genetically modified children?

    WHAT ABOUT THAT??trick-or-treatPS: I wrote this blog post on my iPhone because I despise easy things.

    October 31, 2013
  • Best Greeting Cards

    So says Minnesota Monthly.

    And my mom.

    Jen and I went to the Best Of 2013 party and dazzled the crowd with our Double Dream Hands routine. 

    Best Greeting Cards?

    More like, Best Moves.

    October 25, 2013
  • With Sash And Tiara, We Reign

    When Minnesota Monthly added Zeichen Press to their Best of the Twin Cities list, Jen and I finally polished our tiaras.bigger-fran-and-jen-miss-americaAnd had our likenesses sculpted out of butter.

    Delicious.

    October 18, 2013
  • Easily Distracted In Class

    I think that box was checked on my elementary school progress reports… But who could be bothered with such details??

    Not me. NOT ME. And that’s why I secured a blank progress report, checked the best boxes, and brought it to my parents.

    See? I wasn’t that easily distracted.

    °°

    I am busy taking photographs of the new cardswater-vodka-2but not too busy to document some pretty fascinating activity:

    Aren’t you glad you watched that??

    I know I’m supposed to be doing something… Oh, that’s right, putting hungry vegetables on a card.eat-your-veggies-2No??

    It’ll come to me after I stare out the window and pet that cat.

    October 11, 2013
  • Brain-Slaves

    His conscience was clear and his heart light amidst all his troubles; so he went peaceably to bed, left all his cares to Heaven, and soon fell asleep. In the morning after he had said his prayers, he sat himself down to his work; when, to his great wonder, there stood the shoes all ready made, upon the table.elvesshoemaker-crane1886Elves! 

    (Sorry about the spoiler if you haven’t read that Fairy Tale.)

    I went to a neurologist and he discovered elves in my occipital lobe and that explains everything!brain-with-elves-grabEvery night, I go peaceably to bed, leave all my cares to Heaven, and soon fall asleep — but not before I aggressively ruminate on an idea for a new card. While I sleep, the elves get to work and when I wake up, the new card is done!

    Thank the elves for this new card:that-was-the-best-nap-everTHANK THEM.

    October 2, 2013
  • Ode To My TV (and more)

    In the spirit of AMC’s award winning dramas, Mad Men and Breaking Bad, comes something written by the devil himself.pencil-pusher

    With a script scrawled on toilet paper, using a fountain pen filled with raw sewage, Pencil Pusher weaves a tale so dark, so depressing, viewers are advised to swallow two Xanax before viewing.

    Meet Ernie Frost: One cog in a massive corporate wheel, one man in one cubicle surrounded by countless other cubicles… Floor upon floor of fabric-covered partitions spread like open prairie.

    Deadly open prairie…

    Gone are the days of positive incentives and opening the kimono, these are days of the Corporate Gulag.

    But Ernie Frost has a plan to end the nightmare…

    °°

    Phew! Now I won’t have to throw a brick at my t.v. after the last episode of Breaking Bad.when-i-grow-up

    September 25, 2013
  • Why I’m Such A Catch

    Foraging for low-tide treasure is my third favorite thing to do.

    But what are your top two favorite things to do?

    Nerf Ping Pong

    nerf ping pong

    and smashing piñatas.

    What about your top TEN?

    Glad you asked.

    Cat midwifery,

    cracking glow sticks, raising tadpoles, Belgian beer, letterpress printing, Breaking Bad,breaking badand yoga (just kidding). Number ten is turtle-hunting.

    I know what you’re thinking.

    What a lady!

    Whoa. WHOA. Hands off the merchandise.

    Remember when I was talking about low-tide?

    Here’s a card that features one of my favorite low-tide critters.nice houseWouldn’t you love to get this card with a nice bottle of wine??

    And by “you”, I mean “I”.

    September 17, 2013
  • A Dream, Realized AND So Much More

    Everyone knows that St. Helena has The Best Fall Festival, this side of the Mississippi.

    I did hear that Nativity in St. Paul has a snake pit and a freak-show…

    But Saint Helena has rides and games and prizes — prizes like t-shirts that Jen and I made for the Duck Shoot!lucky ducky pinkand redYeehaw!!

    Give a kid a cork gun, step back (STEP BACK), and watch the magic!duck shootJen is DUCKing.

    September 14, 2013
  • Summit of Greeting Cards

    After spending $80,000 on climbing gear and an entourage of Sherpas in Nepal,

    Shriya Shah-Klorfine (foreground), of Toronto, is shown at the summit of Mount Everest. The body of the Canadian woman who died while returning from the summit of Mount Everest is one step closer to being evacuated from the mountain. THE CANADIAN PRESS/ho-Utmost Adventure Trekking Pvt. Ltd.
    the Canadian woman reached the Summit of Mount Everest.

    I’m sure it was glorious.

    The relief, the pride, the joy!

    BUT, she forgot one teeny-tiny thing: enough oxygen for her descent. With temperatures hovering around -30° and an altitude of 22,000 ft., she laid her body down on the side of the mountain. 

    And died.

    everest1Lesson??

    Never trust a Sherpa.

    Zeichen Press reached a summit too! We’ve been climbing Mount Greeting Card for a looong time and we finally reached the tippity-top: Urban Outfitters.

    …But now I’ll have to set a new goal… Suggestions?

    Urban Outfitters bought this card — but just to be fancy, it will be printed with a bright blue ink:LetsDoThisLet’s do this, indeed.

    September 8, 2013
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