A strange custom:
One child crawls through a tunnel made of other children — the crawling child is spanked on the bottom by each participant. The spankers laugh hysterically.
The concept of automated and industrial scale corporal punishment originated in 19th century Russia.
It’s true!
I’ll spare you the details. Let’s just say that the concept has evolved from judicial whipping of peasants to tunnels of birthday abuse for today’s schoolchildren.
A good friend of mine turned XX (not Roman numerals) and she has such fond memories of the Spanking Machine!
I made her a card:
Thank goodness the deck broke her fall. This wasn’t the first time she threw caution to the wind. It was, in fact, the third. Words are unnecessary when there is photographic evidence of this nature (if you are squeamish, scroll no more):
That’s what a tail looks like when all of the nice stuff has been ripped off of it. Or, as the vet told me, “degloved.” We can’t imagine what she did in the cat world to deserve that treatment.
Meow!
And just to keep it fair, here is a Father’s Day card:
PS: I wrote this blog post on my iPhone because I despise easy things.
And had our likenesses sculpted out of butter.
but not too busy to document some pretty fascinating activity:
No??
Elves! 
Every night, I go peaceably to bed, leave all my cares to Heaven, and soon fall asleep — but not before I aggressively ruminate on an idea for a new card. While I sleep, the elves get to work and when I wake up, the new card is done!
THANK THEM.
and yoga (just kidding). Number ten is turtle-hunting.
Wouldn’t you love to get this card with a 
Yeehaw!!
Jen is DUCKing.
Lesson??
Let’s do this, indeed.