• Here’s the part about salvaging letterpress equipment:

    People (my mom) always (whenever she feigns interest) ask me, “where do you get this stuff?” Type, cabinets, printer’s cuts, ink, chases, quoins, sticks, cutters, furniture, leads, slugs, tympan, rollers… letterpress takes up a lot more space than this tidy little laptop. I wonder if that’s one of the reasons people stopped using it? I doubt it.

    Jen and I both agreed that our favorite salvaging-situation involved a compulsive hoarder with a murder/torture-pit (alleged) in his basement. This house had it all; two commercial espresso machines:

    nera-new-2-group-rails-small-180x121nera-new-2-group-rails-small-180x121

    two Kluge Printing Presses:

    kluge-butner

    (just in case you’re wondering: TWO Kluge Printing presses are massive and would look like this if not covered in books, dvd’s, televisions, kleenex boxes, grocery bags, magazines and mail):

    SONY DSC

    a family-style restaurant booth: (this suspiciously barricaded the basement door)

    restaurant-booth-300x224

    dozens of old computers: (so sentimental)old_computer

     

    “stackable” type cabinets: (we took these)

    type-cabinets-butner-basement

    and this:

    galley-butner-basement

    and this:

    wood-type-butner-basement

    Oh, here’s a fun game:

    Can you find the treasure in this photographic vignette?:

    letterpress-library

    How about here?:pixelated-face-450x600don-butner

    °°°°

    Oh, well. Enough of the sweet, sweet memories. Here’s part of our latest salvage:cabinet-of-wood-type western-wood-type condensed-wood-type

    March 21, 2010
  • A long, long time ago there was no Tanek. Only empty space.

    I loved when Mom would get out the Scotch-tape and add my latest work to the dining room wall.

    fran-andy-dining-room-wall

    I’m not sure if one day she ran out of paper or tape – but she also let me paint right on the windows and the refrigerator.

    I spent the last 10 weeks art directing Tanek’s new website. It was very similar to painting on the refrigerator except without paints or a refrigerator. I worked on the project with my old boss. Don’t confuse this old boss with another old boss I had at the Leeann Chin in Richfield, circa 1989.

    You can go look at the new Tanek site. It’s not painted on the fridge or hanging on the dining room wall but it’s still super awesome. You can really build with the masthead blocks! … Actually, that gives me an idea… build something cool, take a screen grab and e-mail it to Zeichen Press - WHY? I’ll pick the best one, send out some fancy letterpress cards to the winner and publish it on the blog.

    HEY! This is fun!

    March 9, 2010
  • Potato-Guns and Make Magazine

    The other day, I needed to learn how to make a potato gun. It doesn’t matter why. Anyway, I made my way to the MAKE Magazine blog - If you haven’t been – I don’t know what to say. It’s not like we can’t be friends. It will just never be more than that.

    So, they are doing this Maker Business Series and I thought, “hey, I make things… I own a business…” The potato gun would just have to wait. Sorry Edmund. …I sent an e-mail to someone named Gareth (Jen keeps referring to Gareth as “her” – I don’t have the heart to correct her) and told him about Zeichen Press – he responded and then it turned into an interview and… Go read it!!

    March 5, 2010
  • Wake up call

    I try so hard. Really, I do. I try to follow the rules.

    I’m jealous of those people (is it everyone?) that climb out of bed at a respectable hour, get dressed, fuss with their hair, apply make-up, brush their teeth, read the paper, make and drink a cup of coffee…

    In high school, my morning carpool (I say “carpool” but really it was just my friends carting me around like some sort of package. A smoking, swearing package) would lay on her horn outside my house while I lay in my bed – dreaming that I was missing tests because I was laying in bed dreaming that I was missing tests.

    February 24, 2010
  • A whirly-what??

    A whirly-who?

    A metalsmithing kineticist/teacher  needed a business card and we made him this:

    whirligi-business-card-whol2-450x337 whirligig-business-card-450x337

    February 16, 2010
  • Flush

    Apparently, it’s healthy to flush your gallbladder. How? A delicious nightcap: A hearty blend of olive oil and grapefruit juice. Chilled, of course.

    In the spirit of the flush – I thought I’d flush out some old designs. These designs were rejected by clients.

    Not because they didn’t like the designs but because they are just jealous of me.caesar-line-color-bar-450x434 american-dream-diamond chef-hat-american-dream-log1 ne-factory-logo-alone ne-easel-logo1

    has-legs-technicolor

    February 15, 2010
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  • J’Accuse!

    My mind wandered as I listened to the Second Reading. I wondered if I could get my hands on a chocolate milk for lunch. I watched the third graders fidget. I planned my fishing-themed diorama. …Children, let us love not in word or speech but in deed and truth… I figured out what the initials TGIF stood for — oh, that makes sense! …I felt something crawl up my uniform blouse. 

    I felt something crawl up my uniform blouse! Or did I? The question went unanswered because, like Abraham Lincoln in the balcony of Ford’s Theater, I’d been shot. Most likely, an assassination plot carried out by those boys that dumped Mountain Dew on my head last week. Oh, the pain! I signaled my teacher and was escorted to the nurses office by a girl that needed a hero badge to add to her girl scout sash.

    The nurses office was familiar to me. Homesickness was an ailment I suffered from semi-regularly.

    When I staggered through the door, the nurse stopped her mimeographing and looked at me. I pointed to my gunshot wound — nearish my right armpit but closer to a more embarrassing region. She lifted up my blouse. I stared at the poster on the wall.hang-in-there-poster-1970shang-in-there-new

     

    Yes, kitten. I will hang in there.

    It turned out not to be a bullet lodged in my ribcage, but a bee sting.

    In honor of that important event, I created my own Hang in There! card. Do not accuse me of ripping off the original, it is an homage. An HOMAGE.

    May 7, 2012
  • Carpe Matris Diem!

    I think that means Seize Mother’s Day. But maybe not – I am really only fluent in Pig-Latin.

    As far as I know, we all have mothers. I don’t think Science has done away with that yet. And I’m going to boldly state that the majority of readers of the Is That Funny blog love their mothers. Why? My research shows that people who $*#%-ing love Zeichen Press also $*#%-ing love their mothers. My research involved a picture-day slideshow and ham salad sandwiches. Also, $50 bills stuffed in a pińata. It was unorthodox but revealing.

    You still have time to order a Mother’s Day card (and a card for your Mother-In-Law, dear God, DO NOT FORGET HER) from the shop! We will ship it to you so you have time to send (or give) it to mom.

    But, don’t let me tell you what to do. I mean, if you don’t want to celebrate your mom (OR mother-in-law!) on this one day of the year, that’s your decision. I’m sure she won’t be hurt at all. It will never be brought up again.silly-old-daychronic-condition-2eating-her-youngmomb-you-are-the-bomb

    May 4, 2012
  • Once Upon A Time

    Once Upon A Time, there lived a woman who tried and tried to cram a live chicken into a cooking pot. The chicken would not oblige and finally the woman had to accept the notion that live chickens will never submit to such unnatural behavior. Rather than chop off the chicken’s head, they became companions and live in an abandoned mine shaft. The End

    I have dozens of stories like that, just waiting to be published. That reminds me: I was trying really, really hard to write a Father’s Day card. This is what I came up with:papa-bear-goldilocks

    May 1, 2012
  • Copyright Compliance

    At brunch, George Lucas asked me to write a Father’s Day card that suggests a theme from the Star Wars Trilogy but warned me not to use any of the Star Wars imagery. It was a strange request but I accepted the challenge and after tossing back our mimosas, we arm-wrestled and I made this:luke-i-am-your-father

    April 28, 2012
  • Spanking Machine

    A strange custom:

    One child crawls through a tunnel made of other children — the crawling child is spanked on the bottom by each participant. The spankers laugh hysterically.

    The concept of automated and industrial scale corporal punishment originated in 19th century Russia.

    It’s true!

    I’ll spare you the details. Let’s just say that the concept has evolved from judicial whipping of peasants to tunnels of birthday abuse for today’s schoolchildren.

    A good friend of mine turned XX (not Roman numerals) and she has such fond memories of the Spanking Machine!

    I made her a card:small-spanking-layoutsmall-birthday-spankings

    April 24, 2012
  • Yoohoo! Alexis Stewart!

    I’m over here! No… HERE! The one waving her arms and jumping up and down! …The one wearing the poncho and helmet! 

    She must not see me.

    alexis-stewart

    She did mention Zeichen Press on her blog. And she did buy cards from our online shop. I thought that meant she wanted to hang out and talk about black bean chili with butternut squash and swiss chard?

    You can totally call me, Alexis!

    April 18, 2012
  • Six Lives Left and the Fifth Commandment

    Judy was tired of being stuck upstairs. She longed for the streets. She longed for adventure. She longed for danger.

    Day after day, trapped by that drooling, excitable houseguest. It was just too much. She had only one choice: jump off the balcony. balcony-4504Thank goodness the deck broke her fall. This wasn’t the first time she threw caution to the wind. It was, in fact, the third. Words are unnecessary when there is photographic evidence of this nature (if you are squeamish, scroll no more):

    judy-tailThat’s what a tail looks like when all of the nice stuff has been ripped off of it. Or, as the vet told me, “degloved.” We can’t imagine what she did in the cat world to deserve that treatment.

    Just when we stopped crying ourselves to sleep, she came home looking like a BP oil spill casualty.judy-gets-a-bathMeow!

    Poor Judy, only six lives left. Use them wisely.

    Judy happens to be my mother’s name and so this is the perfect way to introduce a new Mother’s Day card:escaped-from-prisonAnd just to keep it fair, here is a Father’s Day card:work-it-dad

    April 17, 2012
  • ACTUAL Cards With Real Healing Powers

    Step right up, step right up!

    It’s here, a cure for all that ails! Do you suffer from one (or more) of the following complications?:

    Bumpy skin?
    Webbed toes?
    Nagging wife?

    No? How about?:

    Limp tongue?

    Rotting scalp?

    Too many fingers?

    Fear not! Just one purchase of a Zeichen Press letterpress greeting card will set you on the proper path to wellness!

    (The following photographs are guaranteed to cure any inflammation:)oldcrab-smaller-forgot-birthdaythanksss-smaller hugh-smaller freaktastic-smaller fatgratitude-smaller facebookbd-smaller chicken-smaller beast-smaller

    April 13, 2012
  • Merry Franmas!!

    I tell my kids that I don’t want anything for my birthday. I tell them that I have everything I need.

    But I’m lying.

    The truth is, I need the following items:pacman-tv-tray

    Using Ouija Board --- Image by © Bettmann/CORBIS

    sony-walkman

    Wait, I needed them in 1984. Never mind. But they would come in handy now. Especially that “waterproof” walkman. (It’s not, I repeat: NOT waterproof). Also, (for the record) that Ouija Board (why was Parker Bros. into the occult?) didn’t even work. It was merely the hors d’oeuvre for the Slumber Party Game: Light As a Feather/Stiff As a Board. Um, if I caught my daughter and her friends playing that game, I’d be like, I GET TO TELL THE STORY AND CUT THE PRETEND HOLE IN THE FOREHEAD AND FILL IT WITH SAND.

    Oh, I wouldn’t… I’d be more like, YOU GIRLS GET TO BED, ENOUGH OF YOUR WITCHCRAFT.

    ALSO, that PacMan tray should only be used for craft projects. Never for food in bed. NEVER FOR FOOD IN BED.

    Hmm, I guess I really don’t need anything.

    PS: Thanks mom, for life!

    PPS: Don’t worry, this is not a Holy Day of Obligation.omgur4t

    April 12, 2012
  • Should You Be Afraid of a Cash Mob?

    No.

    Normally, mobs carry pitchforks and torches but Cash Mobs are different.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b5zUAnIaD4I

    How?

    Cash Mobs are a happy sort and their motivation has nothing to do with drawing or quartering. Cash Mobs support local businesses by encouraging shoppers to spend $20 at an independent boutique on a designated day.shop-local-tag-image

    Isn’t this a beautiful and simple concept? I promise it won’t turn into a Black Friday Walmart thing. Leave your pepper spray at home. 

    i like you is next on the list. (Saturday, April 14.) Have you ever been?! You will be reduced to a giggling mess.

    Just step over the girls.

    sarah-angela-on-the-grass-2

    April 12, 2012
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