• Spanking Machine

    A strange custom:

    One child crawls through a tunnel made of other children — the crawling child is spanked on the bottom by each participant. The spankers laugh hysterically.

    The concept of automated and industrial scale corporal punishment originated in 19th century Russia.

    It’s true!

    I’ll spare you the details. Let’s just say that the concept has evolved from judicial whipping of peasants to tunnels of birthday abuse for today’s schoolchildren.

    A good friend of mine turned XX (not Roman numerals) and she has such fond memories of the Spanking Machine!

    I made her a card:small-spanking-layoutsmall-birthday-spankings

    April 24, 2012
  • Yoohoo! Alexis Stewart!

    I’m over here! No… HERE! The one waving her arms and jumping up and down! …The one wearing the poncho and helmet! 

    She must not see me.

    alexis-stewart

    She did mention Zeichen Press on her blog. And she did buy cards from our online shop. I thought that meant she wanted to hang out and talk about black bean chili with butternut squash and swiss chard?

    You can totally call me, Alexis!

    April 18, 2012
  • Six Lives Left and the Fifth Commandment

    Judy was tired of being stuck upstairs. She longed for the streets. She longed for adventure. She longed for danger.

    Day after day, trapped by that drooling, excitable houseguest. It was just too much. She had only one choice: jump off the balcony. balcony-4504Thank goodness the deck broke her fall. This wasn’t the first time she threw caution to the wind. It was, in fact, the third. Words are unnecessary when there is photographic evidence of this nature (if you are squeamish, scroll no more):

    judy-tailThat’s what a tail looks like when all of the nice stuff has been ripped off of it. Or, as the vet told me, “degloved.” We can’t imagine what she did in the cat world to deserve that treatment.

    Just when we stopped crying ourselves to sleep, she came home looking like a BP oil spill casualty.judy-gets-a-bathMeow!

    Poor Judy, only six lives left. Use them wisely.

    Judy happens to be my mother’s name and so this is the perfect way to introduce a new Mother’s Day card:escaped-from-prisonAnd just to keep it fair, here is a Father’s Day card:work-it-dad

    April 17, 2012
  • ACTUAL Cards With Real Healing Powers

    Step right up, step right up!

    It’s here, a cure for all that ails! Do you suffer from one (or more) of the following complications?:

    Bumpy skin?
    Webbed toes?
    Nagging wife?

    No? How about?:

    Limp tongue?

    Rotting scalp?

    Too many fingers?

    Fear not! Just one purchase of a Zeichen Press letterpress greeting card will set you on the proper path to wellness!

    (The following photographs are guaranteed to cure any inflammation:)oldcrab-smaller-forgot-birthdaythanksss-smaller hugh-smaller freaktastic-smaller fatgratitude-smaller facebookbd-smaller chicken-smaller beast-smaller

    April 13, 2012
  • Merry Franmas!!

    I tell my kids that I don’t want anything for my birthday. I tell them that I have everything I need.

    But I’m lying.

    The truth is, I need the following items:pacman-tv-tray

    Using Ouija Board --- Image by © Bettmann/CORBIS

    sony-walkman

    Wait, I needed them in 1984. Never mind. But they would come in handy now. Especially that “waterproof” walkman. (It’s not, I repeat: NOT waterproof). Also, (for the record) that Ouija Board (why was Parker Bros. into the occult?) didn’t even work. It was merely the hors d’oeuvre for the Slumber Party Game: Light As a Feather/Stiff As a Board. Um, if I caught my daughter and her friends playing that game, I’d be like, I GET TO TELL THE STORY AND CUT THE PRETEND HOLE IN THE FOREHEAD AND FILL IT WITH SAND.

    Oh, I wouldn’t… I’d be more like, YOU GIRLS GET TO BED, ENOUGH OF YOUR WITCHCRAFT.

    ALSO, that PacMan tray should only be used for craft projects. Never for food in bed. NEVER FOR FOOD IN BED.

    Hmm, I guess I really don’t need anything.

    PS: Thanks mom, for life!

    PPS: Don’t worry, this is not a Holy Day of Obligation.omgur4t

    April 12, 2012
  • Should You Be Afraid of a Cash Mob?

    No.

    Normally, mobs carry pitchforks and torches but Cash Mobs are different.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b5zUAnIaD4I

    How?

    Cash Mobs are a happy sort and their motivation has nothing to do with drawing or quartering. Cash Mobs support local businesses by encouraging shoppers to spend $20 at an independent boutique on a designated day.shop-local-tag-image

    Isn’t this a beautiful and simple concept? I promise it won’t turn into a Black Friday Walmart thing. Leave your pepper spray at home. 

    i like you is next on the list. (Saturday, April 14.) Have you ever been?! You will be reduced to a giggling mess.

    Just step over the girls.

    sarah-angela-on-the-grass-2

    April 12, 2012
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  • Black ink can be so nice

    It’s unofficially Summer around here and to celebrate I’m going to make some more prints for Room & Board. People always ask me (no, they don’t) if I feel lonely or maybe a little afraid working out in the studio/shop/time warp at night. But how could I feel lonely or afraid out there when I have all of those cabinets of cold, lead type and Mark Wheat‘s voice coming from the plastic radio?

    newest-room-board-print-450x440

    June 2, 2010
  • More letterpress for Room & Board??!

    I hit my head on the asphalt yesterday and when I snapped out of that familiar concussive daze, I thought to myself: Again? And: That wasn’t as bad as running into the tree. Or the windshield. Or the Christmas tree-stand. Or the windshield. 

    Walking my bicycle and openly weeping, I made it home just in time to work on the new Room & Board project:

    r-and-b-4-450x439 r-and-b-3-450x439 r-and-b-2-450x439 r-and-b-1-450x439r-and-b-layout-450x439

    Thanks MADGE for introducing me to the Polaroid app for my iPhone!!

    May 27, 2010
  • A Typical Day for Zeichen Press (Minneapolis Design and Letterpress Studio At Large)

    “Yeah, you should wear the wig.”

    May 22, 2010
  • Achieving perfect balance

    People always ask me, “Fran, how do you balance everything so well?? Zeichen Press, kids, marriage, hypochondria, facebook, animal-taming, daydreaming – It doesn’t even seem possible!” I wish I had some fluffy (Oprah-approved) secret to share but it’s really much more simple: Evil twin. What?! Yes. You’d be surprised by how many people actually have evil twins.

    This has been a regular rat king of a week: The big Tanek party is tomorrow and Jen and I have been planning the whole thing – From venue to letterpress printed coaster to life-jackets. One of my favorite things is the Tanek 10 Year CD - a music mix and letterpress printed sleeve/party favor/door prize. My playlist skills were honed as a teenager – hour after hour spent with the dual cassette player… see, mom?? I told you it was more important than algebra.

    Tanek 10 Year Party CD Sleeve
    Tanek 10 Year Party CD Sleeve

     

    Tanek 10 Year Party CD Sleeve

    As soon as this party is done I can get rid of that mannequin.

    lucy-and-other-mother

    May 19, 2010
  • Wherein the dog wears a wig for Room and Board and Jen pies type

    millie-wearing-a-wig

    Yes, well… As you can see, the dog was ready to meet with Room and Board today. We fought over the wig but there’s just no talking to her. I don’t even think the wig looks that great  - her fur is a totally different color.

    Whenever Room and Board stops out to visit, Jen dumps a case of type onto another case of type. I think it’s a waste of time but Jen loves wasting time – I have to be like, “Jen, quit wasting time.”

    jen-sorting-type-450x337

    Oh, well – the meeting went great (I think they think we’re strange. Maybe the wig was too much??) They told us to make some more alphabet press-type prints.

    Room & Board - Alphabet B&W

    That’s what they call those. I call them tickets to Cape Cod but that’s none of your business.

    May 12, 2010
  • What DOESN’T a “Long Men’s Wig” have to do with letterpress?

    The creepy severed head would not discourage us from our very important purchase. The wig will play a small, but pivotal, role in our upcoming film (tentatively titled, Your CPR Hurts My Chest).

    one-long-mens-wig-450x328

    May 8, 2010
  • (Edina) Minnesota! Where the Booze Drips Freely From the Trees

    Right? We met with half of the “Jelly Shot Test Kitchen” AND if you don’t know what I’m talking about - you soon will. These Edina ladies (why did I italicize that?) answered a pretty serious question: “What would a jell-o shot look like if it grew up?” 

    Here’s the answer:

    sidecar-orange-slice-jstk

    jtk_4326_sm

    mojito

    A Jelly Shot Test Kitchen “cookbook” (cookbook?) is in the works and they have come to Zeichen Press to help create some buzz. I wonder if it’s because they caught wind of our professionalism. Probably.

    May 6, 2010
  • Craft+Extravaganza=Craftstravaganza

    Does Geek+Spectacular=Geektacular? I was never good at math but I DO know that the State Fairgrounds are going to be wall-to-wall geeks tomorrow. Jen and I will be there handing out love-letters and hugs to all of our loyal customers.

    craftstravaganza-2010-poster-231x300

    We went there tonight to set up. This baby has been following Jen around for, like, two years:

    loretta-and-jen-craftstavanganza-set-up

    May 1, 2010
  • OH, I get it! PR is like stalking!

    Creative, elaborate, polite (but persistent) stalking! Nothing against the creative stalkers out there. You know who you are. Please don’t start re-stalking me.

    I sent out the press package for Tanek today, it contained everything but a pan of brownies and a lock of my hair.

    I hope Neal St. Anthony likes kittens.

    kmoj-tanek-press-package-2-450x337 kmoj-tanek-press-package-3-450x337 kmoj-tanek-press-release-5-450x337

    Did I hand set that type?

    Yes.

    neal-st-anthony-in-the-sti1-450x337

    April 29, 2010
  • email is so 2009

    I love getting a letter in the mail – and getting a package in the mail is like finding money under your pillow. Or discovering a coin in a freshly gutted fish.

    Reading my email goes like this: delete, delete, delete, delete, delete, delete, delete, delete, delete,  delete, delete, delete, delete, delete, delete… oh, that’s important… delete, delete, delete, delete, delete, delete, delete, delete, delete, delete, delete, delete. 

    As you know, Zeichen Press is handling all things that fall into the realm of communications for Tanek Inc. This job is usually less messy than gutting a fish but just as satisfying. Contacting reporters is part of the job and we realized that doing so via email might just be a little bit like whispering to your date across a crowded room. Not that we have dates. Or are ever invited to rooms that are crowded.

    Here is the first part of a press package going out to local reporters. (Neal St. Anthony, you lucky devil!)

    turn-me-on-vintage-radio-web-450x337kmoj-radio-back-web

    (Here’s a story: Ken Piper of Tanek was the head designer for the brand-new KMOJ station in North Minneapolis. That’s right: North Minneapolis. Watch out, South Minneapolis – the Northside is picking up steam!)

    April 26, 2010
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