So says Minnesota Monthly.
And my mom.
Jen and I went to the Best Of 2013 party and dazzled the crowd with our Double Dream Hands routine.
Best Greeting Cards?
More like, Best Moves.
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With Sash And Tiara, We Reign
When Minnesota Monthly added Zeichen Press to their Best of the Twin Cities list, Jen and I finally polished our tiaras.
And had our likenesses sculpted out of butter.Delicious.
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Easily Distracted In Class
I think that box was checked on my elementary school progress reports… But who could be bothered with such details??
Not me. NOT ME. And that’s why I secured a blank progress report, checked the best boxes, and brought it to my parents.
See? I wasn’t that easily distracted.
°°
I am busy taking photographs of the new cards
but not too busy to document some pretty fascinating activity:Aren’t you glad you watched that??
I know I’m supposed to be doing something… Oh, that’s right, putting hungry vegetables on a card.
No??It’ll come to me after I stare out the window and pet that cat.
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Brain-Slaves
His conscience was clear and his heart light amidst all his troubles; so he went peaceably to bed, left all his cares to Heaven, and soon fell asleep. In the morning after he had said his prayers, he sat himself down to his work; when, to his great wonder, there stood the shoes all ready made, upon the table.
Elves! (Sorry about the spoiler if you haven’t read that Fairy Tale.)
I went to a neurologist and he discovered elves in my occipital lobe and that explains everything!
Every night, I go peaceably to bed, leave all my cares to Heaven, and soon fall asleep but not before I aggressively ruminate on an idea for a new card. While I sleep, the elves get to work and when I wake up, the new card is done!Thank the elves for this new card:
THANK THEM. -
Ode To My TV (and more)
In the spirit of AMC’s award winning dramas, Mad Men and Breaking Bad, comes something written by the devil himself.
With a script scrawled on toilet paper, using a fountain pen filled with raw sewage, Pencil Pusher weaves a tale so dark, so depressing, viewers are advised to swallow two Xanax before viewing.
Meet Ernie Frost: One cog in a massive corporate wheel, one man in one cubicle surrounded by countless other cubicles… Floor upon floor of fabric-covered partitions spread like open prairie.
Deadly open prairie…
Gone are the days of positive incentives and opening the kimono, these are days of the Corporate Gulag.
But Ernie Frost has a plan to end the nightmare…
°°
Phew! Now I won’t have to throw a brick at my t.v. after the last episode of Breaking Bad.
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Why I’m Such A Catch
Foraging for low-tide treasure is my third favorite thing to do.
But what are your top two favorite things to do?
Nerf Ping Pong
and smashing pińatas.
What about your top TEN?
Glad you asked.
Cat midwifery,
cracking glow sticks, raising tadpoles, Belgian beer, letterpress printing, Breaking Bad,
and yoga (just kidding). Number ten is turtle-hunting.I know what you’re thinking.
What a lady!
Whoa. WHOA. Hands off the merchandise.
Remember when I was talking about low-tide?
Here’s a card that features one of my favorite low-tide critters.
Wouldn’t you love to get this card with a nice bottle of wine??And by “you”, I mean “I”.
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-33° in Brainerd
That’s where I am. Will I ever be able to get back to Minneapolis? Stay tuned.
And, just because I’m a little obsessed with the weather, I gathered some very important figures. - Record low temperatures in The United States of America:
State Temp. Date Station Elevation Alabama -27 Jan. 30, 1966 New Market 760 Alaska -80 Jan. 23, 1971 Prospect Creek 1,100 Arizona -40 Jan. 7, 1971 Hawley Lake 8,180 Arkansas -29 Feb. 13, 1905 Pond 1,250 California -45 Jan. 20, 1937 Boca 5,532 Colorado -61 Feb. 1, 1985 Maybell 5,920 Connecticut -32 Feb. 16, 1943 Falls Village 585 Delaware -17 Jan. 17, 1893 Millsboro 20 Florida – 2 Feb. 13, 1899 Tallahassee 193 Georgia -17 Jan. 27, 1940 Mauna Kea 13,770 Idaho -60 Jan. 18, 1943 Island Park Dam 6,285 Illinois -36 Jan. 5, 1999 Congerville 722 Indiana -36 Jan. 19, 1994 New Whiteland 785 Iowa -47 Feb. 3, 1996* Elkader 770 Kansas -40 Feb. 13, 1905 Lebanon 1,812 Kentucky -37 Jan. 19, 1994 Shelbyville 730 Louisiana -16 Feb. 13, 1899 Minden 194 Maine -48 Jan. 19, 1925 Van Buren 458 Maryland -40 Jan. 13, 1912 Oakland 2,461 Massachusetts -35 Jan. 12, 1981 Chester 640 Michigan -51 Feb. 9, 1934 Vanderbilt 785 Minnesota -60 Feb. 2, 1996 Tower 1,430 Mississippi -19 Jan. 30, 1966 Corinth 420 Missouri -40 Feb. 13, 1905 Warsaw 700 Montana -70 Jan. 20, 1954 Rogers Pass 5,470 Nebraska -47 Feb. 12, 1899 Camp Clarke 3,700 Nevada -50 Jan. 8, 1937 San Jacinto 5,200 New Hampshire -47 Jan. 29, 1934 Mt. Washington 6,288 New Jersey -34 Jan. 5, 1904 River Vale 70 New Mexico -50 Feb. 1, 1951 Gavilan 7,350 New York -52 Feb. 18, 1979* Old Forge 1,720 North Carolina -34 Jan. 21, 1985 Mt. Mitchell 6,525 North Dakota -60 Feb. 15, 1936 Parshall 1,929 Ohio -39 Feb. 10, 1899 Milligan 800 Oklahoma -27 Jan. 18, 1930 Watts 958 Oregon -54 Feb. 10, 1933* Seneca 4,700 Pennsylvania -42 Jan. 5, 1904 Smethport est. 1,500 Rhode Island -25 Feb. 5, 1996 Greene 425 South Carolina -19 Jan. 21, 1985 Caesars Head 3,100 South Dakota -58 Feb. 17, 1936 McIntosh 2,277 Tennessee -32 Dec. 30, 1917 Mountain City 2,471 Texas -23 Feb. 8, 1933* Seminole 3,275 Utah -69 Feb. 1, 1985 Peter’s Sink 8,092 Vermont -50 Dec. 30, 1933 Bloomfield 915 Virginia -30 Jan. 22, 1985 Mountain Lake 3,870 Washington -48 Dec. 30, 1968 Mazama 2,120 West Virginia -37 Dec. 30, 1917 Lewisburg 2,200 Wisconsin -55 Feb.4, 1996 Couderay 1,300 Wyoming -66 Feb. 9, 1933 Riverside 6,650 AND before we start killing and eating each other, we are entertaining ourselves by throwing boiling water into the cold air.
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0°, Hydraulics and a Hair Dryer
Why is it that the one time I leave my house something awesome happens?? Jack drove the Heidelberg Windmill down from Wahpeton, North Dakota this morning. Drove it right down to our fancy studio.
I’m in Brainerd not running around the house in my underwear and Jen is back at ZP headquarters. Who knew (Jack the mover knew) that the press was going to be delivered TODAY? Apparently, the hydraulic part of the pallet jack (not Jack the mover) didn’t love the 0°. I guess it was frozen and I’m no expert but that seems like a setback. Jen called me wondering where she could find a hair dryer. I don’t know why she wanted to style her hair but I’m not going to judge. Apparently, Jen’s beautiful hair did the trick because the new press is safe and sound in the SW corner of the shop.
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It’s ART!! DO YOU HEAR ME?? ART!!
Alphabetically speaking, Zeichen follows Warhol in the Room and Board dictionary. Andy Warhol and Zeichen Press sit side-by-side on the Wall Art page - I don’t want to speak for Mr. Warhol BUT I’ll bet he is thrilled with the proximity… This might be just the thing to jump-start his career… Good luck, Andy!! You weird, prolific little man!!
So, back on the R&B website – here’s what the description DOESN’T say:
Produced entirely by hand using
vintage (super old) printing equipment,
Zeichen Press creates this letterpress
design exclusively for us in their
Minneapolis studio. Actually, they call
it a studio but really it was once the
family garage – an issue that nearly
cost the owner (Fran Shea) her marriage,
and more importantly, the garage.
I mean, studio. Using a centuries-old
manual printing method, they set salvaged,
antique type by hand in limited print runs
to give the work a one-of-a-kind quality
that feels both modern and classic.
°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°
They edited that copy down to the nub! But I suppose they know best.Have a look at these photos: GASP! They make me want to buy one of my own prints!
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The strong would survive the winter. The weak would, of course, be eaten.
The Long Winter is the true tale of a Minnesota family surviving one of the most brutal Winters in our recorded history. Trapped in the house – day after day after day – the blizzard makes it impossible to see out the window or even walk out to the barn without getting lost. Good ol’ Pa rigs up a rope to follow, he is always coming up with some creative solution! Ma follows that rope because Pa finds himself trapped in a ditch by the creek. The wood pile dwindles to nothing and the family is forced to twist hay into little bundles – they would burn these in the cast-iron stove to heat their little house. … Tough, brown bread is the only food left to eat.
Or is it?
What if that was on the jacket flap? I’d totally read that book.
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It’s time for Christmas rejects!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5SH1j1luFOw&feature=related
Gosh, that’s a scary movie! Those poor misfit toys… the choo-choo with the square wheels, the pistol that shoots jelly, the effeminate jack-in-the-box… I think the jack-in-the-box and that little dentist-elf would make a cute couple.
Okay, so I keep trying to design something to print on these FIVE THOUSAND BEVERAGE COASTERS that we have lying around. I guess no one cares about preserving the shine and luster of their finished furniture.
I think that’s barbaric.
Maybe they think it sends the wrong message? I don’t. I think it’s perfectly acceptable to booze it up through the 12 days of Christmas. In fact, it is acceptable all year round IF you set your drink on one of our beverage coasters. (Was that some sort of plug?? Yes. Here’s a link: AND here’s one I designed just for Touchpoint Retail. It has the recipe for a candy cane martini right on it. Isn’t that handy??
They decided to go with a card design from the Zeichen Press line but JUST TO BE DIFFICULT (I mean, sui generis.) they had us print it on an oversized SQUARE coaster. But I must admit, it’s pretty darn nice.
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Two-timing ZP
But I LOVE you Zeichen Press! I do. It’s just that Tanek has something (money) that you don’t have. Does that sound shallow? It’s not, I swear. It’s not just the money. They make me coffee. AND they tell me I do good work. You just sit there and take. And take and take and take – a word that comes to mind is “relentless.” But not in a bad way. Did I mention they’re architects? I know! Restaurants, retail, residential… Wait, did I mention restaurants?… Of course you had to know, the signs were everywhere. Remember when I made those Tanek paper dolls?
Or that 4-color halftone?
Wait, that was just last week. Anyway, I’m totally NOT breaking up with you. I’m just going to be seeing them too. But that’s cool, right? Don’t be so selfish.
**Editor’s Note: What does this mean??? Zeichen Press is just doing some marketing for Tanek.
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Just a Christmas Card
No big deal.
Just a photoshopped-four-color-halftone-letterpress-printed Christmas Card.
Jen and I were like, “Oh, that’s cool. For a Christmas card.”
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No Coast 2009, Sleestacks and ANOTHER Doppelganger
WHEW! What a weekend!
First of all, Amanda came to my house to do my hair.
She did.
Shut up.
I totally care about how I look. It seemed strange to look so beautiful AND carry 500 lbs of cards from a loading dock to a folding table. But I did it for the kids. Jen and I have worked out a system of communication that really facilitates a speedy set up: Jen orders me around like some sort of slave and I stifle sobs behind my Crying Scarf.
There was another letterpress company about 10 feet away from us and we had to fight to defend our turf. Zeichen Press ended up winning because we have better dance moves and we bribed the judges with Bazooka gum.
I figured out something pretty important on Saturday morning: I look like a Sleestack.
OH! Another thing that was pretty amazing: That dapper gent from one of our new cards actually bought the card that he is on!
I love a handsome man with a wallet full of cash. (Do you hear me, Kenny?!)
Let’s see… oh, yes.. the show was jam-packed and we made gobs of moola. I mean, we spread the joy of the season through letterpress goodness.
Here’s me laughing at one of my own jokes:
And here’s Jen endlessly fussing over a display:
I almost forgot to share this bit of news: Somebody actually stole an entire stack of these:
What the???
She must be a professional stalker.
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Mr. Heidelberg… you RASCAL!
If all goes according to my master plan, 2,500 pounds of love will soon be mine.
2,500 pounds…
That’s one of these:
Or two of him:
Are you intrigued??
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There Is No Turning Back
The new logo has been crafted of copper and is ready for printing.
…But who are those people supposed to be?? And why does the woman wear her hair as if it were 1986?? Only I know the answers to these mysteries and I have just boarded a train headed for Zermatt.
