Zeichen Press – Page 6 – Design & Letterpress for the people.

Winter Preview

The Winter Walk Home from school included two memorable rituals: Dipping our un-mittened hands in 25� Tom Thumb coffee�(how old IS she?)�and passing by a very high retaining wall.

The wall held up the yard of our enemies: Two freckle-faced, red-headed brothers. These boys went to a�Public School�and as if that isn’t bad enough, they took great pleasure in tormenting me.

I will remind you that�this�is what I looked like:

Why would anyone want to harm such a sweet creature?

Armed with boulders of snow, poised-and-ready atop the wall � they would wait. Down Vincent Avenue I trudged: snow-pants under my plaid skirt, grease-covered hand-me-down coat, knit cap with sheepskin earflaps.

Again, why would anyone want to harm such a sweet creature?

I won’t tell you the ending.

We had a dusting of snow the other day but I knew better than to break out the snow-pants and knit cap. It was merely a teaser, a preview, an appetizer, an AMUSE-GUEULE.

Speaking of snow,�here’s a new card:�

November 14, 2012
Winternship� & Skin Suits

Zeichen Press has never had a Wintertime Intern.

Until now.

I expect the new “intern” to make me laugh.�It’s an important job.�She also claims she will sort type and organize cards but we’ll see. WE’LL SEE.

In other news:�I made ANOTHER�Thinking Of You�card. I thought and thought about what sort of message I’d like to receive if I were down-in-the-dumps, and I came up with this:My sister wanted me to show�The-Softer-Side-Of-Fran, but all I could think of was Marshmallow Fluff� and then I just wanted to sit on the beach and pull hermit crabs out of their shells.

What is wrong with me?

November 8, 2012
Snail Mail : Our Bread & Butter

There has been an ethical debate raging regarding snail shell art. Some feel that humans have the right to decorate the shells of�living snails.

Where do I stand?�The following new birthday card reveals my feelings on this sensitive subject:Please respect my freedom of speech.

Speaking of�freedom: Come down to�Foiled Again�on Saturday night for some�free�wine. While you’re there, you could buy some of our cards!

Two birds! One stone!

November 1, 2012
Insomnia and the Woolly Mammoth

I can’t wait until scientists clone the Woolly Mammoth.

Some might call it reckless curiosity, I call it Vegas-style science. Implanting salvaged Woolly Mammoth nuclei into an unsuspecting Asian Elephant sounds safe to me ��what could happen?�

Meanwhile,�I lay awake�and�imagine receiving (or not receiving) a baby Woolly Mammoth as a gift.�

October 27, 2012
I’ve Never Been To Paris

But I�did�take French in high school so I know all about magnetephones, l’autobus, et la lunettes pour Luc.

For the foreseeable future, I will stay within a 30 mile radius of the Zeichen Press headquarters and dream of faraway lands.Feeling the need for a Field Trip, I went to the Other Side Of Minneapolis and visited�Rex Mills. I walked through the front door, broke the tenth commandment,�(You shall not covet�- geez, get your mind out of the gutter)�pretended I had something in my eye, snapped some photos, threw a drink in the owner’s face, stole five pounds of ink, and left.That man in the photograph is not the owner � Rex Mills has�Press Operators.

I will kidnap him as soon as my taser gun arrives in the mail.

October 21, 2012
But Wait, There’s More!

Bears have it best � fattening up and slipping into their Wintertime coma. I sit here, like a fool, planning my Wintertime Wardrobe � if I never had to shower, I would wear my neck to ankle long-underwear uninterrupted.

I have Faith that Winter will eventually turn to Spring.

In Spring, I will tear off my layers of long-underwear. I will bury my Smartwool in the backyard. I will shun my calf-length coat like an old boyfriend.�(I can’t believe I was with YOU!!)

In Spring, kids graduate from educational institutions. And because I am a Giver, I give you these:�New graduation cards.�Don’t be like, “Why are you thinking about graduation in October?”

Just accept the greeting card calendar. ACCEPT IT.

October 15, 2012

The Perfect Christmas Cards

Thank you,�Religion News Service, for�appreciating�the ho-ho-Holiday-humdrum-hole-filling. �And thank you, Dinah the Cat, for understanding the true meaning of Christmas.And you’re right, you should be in the new Christmas card.

December 15, 2015
Holiday Season Opener

Oh,�No Coast Craft-o-Rama… You never let us down!�The�Midtown Market’s halls were decked and bedazzled with all things Holiday… And handmade�goodness was traded for cold-hard-cash.

The Zeichen Press Empire is always draped in black fabric because black is slimming.

Here’s a new Christmas card/fantasy?:

December 8, 2015
This Time of Year Fills Me With

The�No Coast Craft-O-Rama�is TODAY�and tomorrow�(December 4th and 5th) and Jen has been feverishly printing in preparation.

She must have been too busy to notice my new woodpile!Come see all of the Holiday Goodies at the�Midtown Global Market�today � Jen will be giving out free hugs with every purchase!

December 4, 2015
THANK YOU!

Once Upon A Time,�my sister got the stomach flu so bad. Poor thing… up in the middle of the night… every bit of food evacuating her body post-haste. Who knew the colon could churn and transform loose stool into clear�liquid? Well, my brother found out when he sleep-stumbled into the bathroom and slipped and skated on the translucent trots that never made it into the toilet-bowl.

See? Analogy. Our gratitude just pours out of us! It’s almost like a medical condition.

To “give back”, we are hosting Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade!

Tune in!

November 26, 2015
FINE. We can be friends.

**An Open Letter to Alexis Stewart:

Dear Alexis Stewart,

If you want to be friends with me, just ask. You don’t need to buy all of your Christmas and birthday AND Mother’s Day cards from me.

Friends Forever,

Fran

—

Whew! I’m glad I got that out of the way! Thanks to�Mail Chimp, our email-blast campaign was full of success.

Wanna know what�Mother’s Day�card�Martha Stewart�is getting in 2016???

I’LL NEVER TELL!!!

November 21, 2015
Wherein One Woman Does NOT Go Gentle Into That Good Night

Does my IQ have to be higher to understand Sci-Fi films?? �As the credits rolled for Interstellar, I whispered, to myself,�“whaaat???”�Maybe I should have taken 100 classes to prep me? All of that technlogy and time-talk made me wish I was working on the new Zeichen Press catalog that Jen so agressively marked-up.I’LL GET TO IT. As soon as I finish rewatching Mad Men.

And while I’m (not) doing that,�The Internis�gallivanting about in Italy like some sort of hippie. Well, let’s just see if you have a studio to come home to. (OMG, I’M KIDDING. Please come home. And bring us souvenirs.)

November 13, 2015
#empathycards

“WHY DIDN’T I THINK OF THAT??”

~Fran Shea

These cards�stopped me right in my (dog) poop-covered tracks:Let’s be friends,�Emily McDowell.

Too needy?�

November 4, 2015
Non! Je Ne Regrette Rien!

Dinah always makes�such�a big deal about choosing paper and envelope color for a new release.

First, she has Jen print a card:

And then she does this:

She is such a taskmaster.

October 27, 2015
NOT YOUR DOORMAT

Greeting cards would be better if they were huge. And I could wipe my feet on them.

And what better way to spread the Good Word of Zeichen Press than by emblazoning it upon the doormat of�every doorstep for every home throughout the land?High Cotton�makes lots of things, for lots of people. And now they will make doormats for us. I mean,�for you.�They’ll make doormats for you. Designed by us.

October 26, 2015
Gracias…

…El Ni�o.�I know I’m supposed to be cursing Climate Change… I KNOW.

But how can I curse when meteorologists are predicting a�warmer-than-usual�winter??

I must embrace the phenomenon the way a mother embraces her wayward son.

IN OTHER NEWS, Jen and I chose 12 cards for the next release using darts, a cardboard cutout of Steve Buscemi, and our first-aid kit.

Here’s a teaser:And because I always plan ahead, here’s a new Father’s Day card:

October 17, 2015