The Winter Walk Home from school included two memorable rituals: Dipping our un-mittened hands in 25¢ Tom Thumb coffee (how old IS she?) and passing by a very high retaining wall.
The wall held up the yard of our enemies: Two freckle-faced, red-headed brothers. These boys went to a Public School and as if that isn’t bad enough, they took great pleasure in tormenting me.
I will remind you that this is what I looked like:
Why would anyone want to harm such a sweet creature?
Armed with boulders of snow, poised-and-ready atop the wall — they would wait. Down Vincent Avenue I trudged: snow-pants under my plaid skirt, grease-covered hand-me-down coat, knit cap with sheepskin earflaps.
Again, why would anyone want to harm such a sweet creature?
I won’t tell you the ending.
We had a dusting of snow the other day but I knew better than to break out the snow-pants and knit cap. It was merely a teaser, a preview, an appetizer, an AMUSE-GUEULE.
Speaking of snow, here’s a new card: 
My sister wanted me to show The-Softer-Side-Of-Fran, but all I could think of was Marshmallow Fluff® and then I just wanted to sit on the beach and pull hermit crabs out of their shells.
Please respect my freedom of speech.
Feeling the need for a Field Trip, I went to the Other Side Of Minneapolis and visited 
That man in the photograph is not the owner — Rex Mills has Press Operators.
YOU MUST REALLY BE SUFFERING!
(I was just as stoic as the woman in the above illustration while they performed my surgery. Eyes wide open, no tears.)
But I’ll do it for you, reader, because I’m a giver. A GIVER.
“
(WARNING: The above image IS NOT AN ACTUAL BUTTON, MOM)
How could I have been so blind for so long?!
