• The Big Picture

    This is the face of a girl who got a globe for Christmas the year before. A girl determined to prove to everyone how much she needed; NAY, deserved the Lite-Brite. fran-lite-brite

    Santa would never make that mistake again. 

    This determination guided the girl for a lifetime, nothing would stand between her and her singleminded fixations. Fran etch a sketch

    NOTHING.

    fran-covered-in-kittens

    One of the latest obstacles were some pesky illustrated creatures 45510_frog_concertwho needed to be removed so one frog could fulfill his God-given right to sing Wayne Newton.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LRPILZS1hc8

    And sing he did. 

    darling-danke-schon

    Yours for only $4.50! (SOON.)

    darling-frog

    October 21, 2016
  • Slightly Different

    Usually bragging is reserved for Facebook, family newsletters, and prison cells. But showering has made me feel fancy and solitary confinement has made me such a blabbermouth!
    SO behold our new bathroom:bathroom-newMillie wanted to show off the bathroom but she isn’t tall enough to open the backdoor.squirrel-millie-wordsToo bad we re-screened that door!

    Did that squirrel even know he/she was the color of my new grout?? I’m kidding! I’m sure he/she did!

    Speaking of Dove Gray™ grout, (WERE WE??) I made a new card. Intern #1 said it was Mom Humor. I told her to go to her room.an-elephant-never-forgets

    October 11, 2016
  • Copy. Paste. Repeat. Copy. Paste. Repeat. Copy. Paste. Repeat. Copy. Paste. Repeat.

    Have I mentioned how much Millie The Dog one-dog-named-milliebarks at anything and everything within a 500 foot perimeter of our house? Mailman, delivery-person, solicitors, neighbors, guests, the kids, trick-or-treaters, my mom… We’ve talked a lot about it and she feels super responsible for alerting us – I told her that we really don’t need that kind of help, BUT WE DID. SHE WAS RIGHT. SHE’S ALWAYS RIGHT.

    SO, my driveway was full of a dumpster filled with bathroom remodel debris, Millie was having a staycation with a friend, AND SOME JERK CLIPPED THE LOCK ON OUR SHED AND STOLE MY BIKE.cut-lockAnd he threw the lock in the dirt like some sort of criminal.

    AND THEN, the loser (no judgment) tried to sell MY bike on a site called OfferUp.com.img_3265

    But he is as slippery as an eel wrapped in a banana peel, and disappeared INTO THE NIGHT. Police have been alerted, prayers to St. Anthony have been said. I asked St. Anthony if he could forward my prayers onto the Patron Saint of Stolen Goods and he told me to go back to sleep and stop Googling escutcheons for the new bathroom.

    FINE.

    While I wait for my miracle, I spend days mindlessly migrating ALL of the content from the Zeichen Press site to THE NEW Zeichen Press site. DON’T WORRY, you won’t even be able to tell the difference because we wanted to spend a lot of money on something that nobody notices.

    OH, and Jen got some new/old cutslittle-man-in-cutsso I made a Father’s Day Card out of that little man.go-to-bedBACK TO MIGRATING/WEEPING.

    September 22, 2016
  • Hygiene Tester

    I did the math and figured out that two toilets MINUS one toilet EQUALS one toilet. And one shower MINUS one shower EQUALS zero showers.

    I desperately yelled that equation to the boys during my bathroom demo, but they pretended not to hear me.boys bathroom demoI only gave birth to them to provide me with free manual labor. Ha! Who’s laughing now, boys??

    Anyway, who needs a shower??Arnie GrapeOR a bath??bathroom mid-project.smallI barely do.

    And as soon as all of my family and friends get back from being out of town for a month, they’ll tell you the same.

    Here’s a new birthday card/fantasy:Happy Bidet

    September 5, 2016
  • Jenmas Eve!

    Everyone celebrates Jenmas Eve differently.*I* like to go to Hot Plate SANS Jen to eat a Mexican Omelet surrounded by a gallery of paint-by-number masterpieces.

    Hot Plate wall

    YEARS AGO, Jen (carefully) slaved away over *her* masterpiece and it sits atop a shelf of knick-knacks in Cape Cod. 

    knick knack shelf cape cod jen made thisShe was so dedicated! 

    I bet she knew that someday I’d repay her in birthday cards.

    dog person crazy cat lady

    August 25, 2016
  • Will Design 4… White Italian Cararra Marble Hexagon Tile

    The Art Licensor (RSVP) asked us for some birthday cards and because I love to work/need money, I made nine. I won’t bore you with the details/need to get back to listening to my new podcast (My Favorite Murder).

    Here are a few… Will they choose any???

    Stay tuned.

    rsvp.2.self medicating rsvp.i buried rsvp.your birthday called rsvp.birthday cake.one piece

    Thank you, Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark. I can’t wait until Alexis Stewart and I meet you in person!

    August 16, 2016
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  • Merry Christmas!

    As is custom in our culture, piñatas will be stuffed with liver sausage!pinatas

    December 24, 2013
  • Blog Post Meridiem

    Nighttime is just like daytime but with fewer socks and more Professor Blastoff.

    Who is Professor Blastoff??professor-blastoff-poster

    Professor Blastoff is a podcast/my gateway to dreamland. Not because it’s boring! Shut your pretty mouth. But because these three comedians lull me me to sleep with their soothing silliness. How can silliness be soothing?? Just listen to it and quit judging me.

    Speaking of professors, a(n) (assistant) professor (Alicia Erian) at Northeastern University (Department of English and Tomfoolery) took such a shine to Zeichen Press that she is our new (virtual) intern! Responsibilities include (but aren’t limited to): Telling me how awesome I am.

    She didn’t love this next card but I still love her.marriage-is-2

    December 17, 2013
  • How two women spun straw into gold at the No Coast Craft-o-Rama

    In this story, the ‘straw’ is paper-and-ink and the ‘gold’ is a cash box full of cash.

    If only mortgage companies and grocery stores accepted hugs and back rubs in exchange for their products and services! Alas, they do not, and so we are forced to peddle our wares. no-coast-2013Normally, shops around the WORLD (that’s right) peddle our goods for us, but once a year, we come out of hiding, and on horseback, to peddle our own goods at the beloved No Coast Craft-o-Rama.

    Is it because we love laughter and the spirit of the Holiday Season? Or is it because we love money?

    Oh, the reformed Scrooge inside of me says it’s not about the money. IT’S NOT.money-doesnt-buy-happiness

    December 10, 2013
  • See You There!

    Where?

    AT THE MIDTOWN GLOBAL MARKET FOR THE NO COAST CRAFT-O-RAMA!!

    Directions:

    1) Put on all of your clothes and coats.

    2) Hitch sled-dogs to sled.

    3) MUSH!!

    sled-dogs

    4) Do ALL of your Holiday shopping. And eating.

    Is there a better way to embrace the Holiday season??

    NO.must-enjoy-winter

    December 6, 2013
  • Halls (Of The Midtown Global Market) Will Be Decked With Such Goodness

    There is always SO MUCH TO DO this time of year! Jen has to print and fold about a million cards and I have to sit still so my daughter can do my nails.panda-nails-2Yes, those are adorable pandas. And yes, that is stigmata.

    The No Coast Craft-o-Rama has an amazing line up this year (as usual), there is Miss Amy Jo, Adam Turman, glass|wares, Cosmo’s Collars, Moss Love Terrariums, Oh Dier, Soup Hunter Guitars, and… so… much… MORE!!

    SO, bring your money and your eyeballs and get ready to check everyone off your Christmas list! AND send a belated Chanukah card (is that a thing??)funky-beat-30-f8

    December 3, 2013
  • Eight Days of Thanksgiving

    Postable asked me to create a card that celebrates a very rare occurrence: Thanksgiving and Hanukkah falling on the same day. I don’t know much about the Jewish Faith but I think that means eight days of leftovers.happy-thanksgivukkahThis mash-up won’t happen again for another 77,000 years.

    It’s true.

    In other news… Jen and I will celebrate Thanksgiving the way we always do: in period costume. Twist: Jen will be dunked in the dunking chair until she confesses to being a witch.

    Happy Thanksgiving!

    November 27, 2013
  • A Winter Cocoon

    Now that the temperature has dropped to depressing lows, I’ve turned to TLC reruns for comfort. …My Strange Addiction is the best thing on television… Why wouldn’t I gorge myself on other people’s dysfunction?

    But enough about women addicted to drinking their own urine. Here’s a card about perspective.feeling-bad

    November 26, 2013
  • How To Be A Supercentenarian

    It’s easy!Misao Okawa

    Old folks like Misao Okawa credit their longevity to poached eggs and whiskey.

    Oh, I can do that.

    November 18, 2013
  • Norway? YESway!

    We’ve had some big orders come in from a shop in Oslo… I’ve been trying to figure out how they heard of Zeichen Press…

    Here’s how: If you take a running start, and are a good swimmer, you can get to Oslo from Denmark, and Denmark is just Germany’s top hat… And Germany, as you know, is the birthplace of Gutenberg.44858_print_pressAnd of letterpress… Right? LETTER press?? ZEICHEN Press?? Clearly Zeichen Press is synonymous with letterpress in that part of the world. All they had to do was google letterpress to find this:fran and jen vintage hair updo.words

    There you have it.

    Mystery solved.

    Takk Liebling.

    Oh, clearly they speak English, but I don’t speak Norwegian — and that’s where the interweb comes in handy:liebling page about us nowegianTranslator says:lieblig page about us englishClass dismissed.

    November 15, 2013
  • Alexis and Martha Stewart DO Love Zeichen Press

    I knew it!

    They’ve only been pretending to not see me chase them down the street! Kidders!
    Alexis just ordered all of her Holiday cards from the Zeichen Press shop… which card will she send to Martha??moose-30-f8
    November 9, 2013
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