• A Pigeon in My Flashing (and Other Bedtime Stories)

    When Nature and Civilization collide it sounds just like stirring twelve tin cans in the bathtub with a golf club. This sound, combined with another sound—the sound of a pair of teeny-tiny hands strangling a pigeon.

    I laid in bed for 1…2…3…4…5 hours and listened to, what I concluded was, a pigeon trapped behind the flashing on my house.help-me-pigeon

    A squirrel met its maker (Bruce Hornsby) that same way last Summer. But not before it spent several days running itself to death. Was the pigeon luckier? It shivered in the cold until shortly before dawn. Like the Little Match Girl, it shivered to death, clutching a clawful of burnt matches.

    We have a client that needs graphics for its trucks so while I listened to the pathetic cries of the dying pigeon, I thought about that.

    It was a productive night.

    January 14, 2012
  • OMGUR4T

    A surprise birthday party is 1,000% more fun than a regular birthday party. The planners plan for weeks – sending out secret invitations:becky-invite-w-envelope-10x10

    Unearthing senior photos to print on drink coasters:becky-coaster

    And finally the moment arrives!

    January 9, 2012
  • In January It’s So Nice

    Hello, January. I hate you. Not as much as February, but I still hate you. I tell my children that you are full of fun and possibilities but I am lying.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-NOJIYe6qoI

    Perhaps this card captures my true feelings:what-fresh-hell

    January 7, 2012
  • Tribulation Consolation

    Sometimes (not very often) I find myself at a loss for words. Speechless. Struck dumb by powerful emotion. “I’m stunned. I mean, I’m in a state of… somebody should just throw a blanket over me, you know?” – Woody Allen (Manhattan)

    Sometimes an empathy card is better than a sympathy card.

    Sometimes a bear playing violin says it all.there-are-no-words

    January 1, 2012
  • Taking (A Fearless Moral) Inventory

    Jen told me that she is learning to master Quickbooks. I trust her.jen-puzzle

    I bet that the Quickbooks tutorial requires puzzle completion before you really get into the meat of the application—just to make sure the user is nimble-minded.

    The New Year is upon us and to celebrate I stood on a chair, my head surrounded by asbestos wrapped pipes, and counted envelopes.fran-counting-inventoryJen said this was called taking inventory and while I am familiar with this as a spiritual concept, with a priest and confessional handy, I was easily distracted because the priest and confessional were replaced by the dog and a bin of Bazooka bubble gum.one-dog-named-milliebazooka-binThese items were not on Jen’s listjen-inventory-listbut I think that was a potentially expensive oversight. Just to be on the safe side, I counted one dog named Millie and 34 pieces of Bazooka.

    You’re welcome, Jen. 

    December 31, 2011
  • Fortune Teller, Tell My Fortune

    Winter has been creeping in like a gas leak and I am always pleasantly surprised to find myself awake in the morning. It would not take long for the madness of Winter to descend upon the little house. Letterpress printed on recycled paper. Comes with coordinating envelope and packaged in cellophane sleeve.

    “That’s nice.” I say, as I stretch and crawl off my sofa-bed. Never one to miss nuance, I wonder why I’m not in my own bed.

    Good design sometimes requires getting into character – I’ve been dressing like a gypsy (not showering) for our latest Tanek project. A paper fortune teller is easier to mail than a crystal ball and some might argue – more accurate. Tanek will send 300 of these out to their dearest friends – I only hope they take the responsibility of predicting the future seriously:

    fortune-teller-1fortune-teller-5 fortune-teller-2 fortune-teller-3 fortune-teller-4  fortune-teller-6

    December 21, 2011
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  • -33° in Brainerd

    That’s where I am. Will I ever be able to get back to Minneapolis? Stay tuned.

    And, just because I’m a little obsessed with the weather, I gathered some very important figures. - Record low temperatures in The United States of America:

    State Temp. Date Station Elevation
    Alabama -27 Jan. 30, 1966 New Market 760
    Alaska -80 Jan. 23, 1971 Prospect Creek 1,100
    Arizona -40 Jan.  7, 1971 Hawley Lake 8,180
    Arkansas -29 Feb. 13, 1905 Pond 1,250
    California -45 Jan. 20, 1937 Boca 5,532
    Colorado -61 Feb.  1, 1985 Maybell 5,920
    Connecticut -32 Feb. 16, 1943 Falls Village 585
    Delaware -17 Jan. 17, 1893 Millsboro 20
    Florida – 2 Feb. 13, 1899 Tallahassee 193
    Georgia -17 Jan. 27, 1940 Mauna Kea 13,770
    Idaho -60 Jan. 18, 1943 Island Park Dam 6,285
    Illinois -36 Jan.  5, 1999 Congerville 722
    Indiana -36 Jan. 19, 1994 New Whiteland 785
    Iowa -47 Feb.  3, 1996* Elkader 770
    Kansas -40 Feb. 13, 1905 Lebanon 1,812
    Kentucky -37 Jan. 19, 1994 Shelbyville 730
    Louisiana -16 Feb. 13, 1899 Minden 194
    Maine -48 Jan. 19, 1925 Van Buren 458
    Maryland -40 Jan. 13, 1912 Oakland 2,461
    Massachusetts -35 Jan. 12, 1981 Chester 640
    Michigan -51 Feb.  9, 1934 Vanderbilt 785
    Minnesota -60 Feb.  2, 1996 Tower 1,430
    Mississippi -19 Jan. 30, 1966 Corinth 420
    Missouri -40 Feb. 13, 1905 Warsaw 700
    Montana -70 Jan. 20, 1954 Rogers Pass 5,470
    Nebraska -47 Feb. 12, 1899 Camp Clarke 3,700
    Nevada -50 Jan.  8, 1937 San Jacinto 5,200
    New Hampshire -47 Jan. 29, 1934 Mt. Washington 6,288
    New Jersey -34 Jan.  5, 1904 River Vale 70
    New Mexico -50 Feb.  1, 1951 Gavilan 7,350
    New York -52 Feb. 18, 1979* Old Forge 1,720
    North Carolina -34 Jan. 21, 1985 Mt. Mitchell 6,525
    North Dakota -60 Feb. 15, 1936 Parshall 1,929
    Ohio -39 Feb. 10, 1899 Milligan 800
    Oklahoma -27 Jan. 18, 1930 Watts 958
    Oregon -54 Feb. 10, 1933* Seneca 4,700
    Pennsylvania -42 Jan.  5, 1904 Smethport est. 1,500
    Rhode Island -25 Feb.  5, 1996 Greene 425
    South Carolina -19 Jan. 21, 1985 Caesars Head 3,100
    South Dakota -58 Feb. 17, 1936 McIntosh 2,277
    Tennessee -32 Dec. 30, 1917 Mountain City 2,471
    Texas -23 Feb.  8, 1933* Seminole 3,275
    Utah -69 Feb.  1, 1985 Peter’s Sink 8,092
    Vermont -50 Dec. 30, 1933 Bloomfield 915
    Virginia -30 Jan. 22, 1985 Mountain Lake 3,870
    Washington -48 Dec. 30, 1968 Mazama 2,120
    West Virginia -37 Dec. 30, 1917 Lewisburg 2,200
    Wisconsin -55 Feb.4,   1996 Couderay 1,300
    Wyoming -66 Feb.  9, 1933 Riverside 6,650

    AND before we start killing and eating each other, we are entertaining ourselves by throwing boiling water into the cold air.

    rob-turns-water-to-steam

    January 2, 2010
  • 0°, Hydraulics and a Hair Dryer

    Why is it that the one time I leave my house something awesome happens?? Jack drove the Heidelberg Windmill down from Wahpeton, North Dakota this morning. Drove it right down to our fancy studio.

    zeichen-press-hq

    I’m in Brainerd not running around the house in my underwear and Jen is back at ZP headquarters. Who knew (Jack the mover knew) that the press was going to be delivered TODAY? Apparently, the hydraulic part of the pallet jack (not Jack the mover) didn’t love the 0°. I guess it was frozen and I’m no expert but that seems like a setback. Jen called me wondering where she could find a hair dryer. I don’t know why she wanted to style her hair but I’m not going to judge. Apparently, Jen’s beautiful hair did the trick because the new press is safe and sound in the SW corner of the shop.

    get-the-heidelberg-off-the

    get-the-heidelberg-on-the-pthe-heidelber-is-home

     

    January 2, 2010
  • It’s ART!! DO YOU HEAR ME?? ART!!

    Alphabetically speaking, Zeichen follows Warhol in the Room and Board dictionary. Andy Warhol and Zeichen Press sit side-by-side on the Wall Art page - I don’t want to speak for Mr. Warhol BUT I’ll bet he is thrilled with the proximity… This might be just the thing to jump-start his career… Good luck, Andy!! You weird, prolific little man!!

    So, back on the R&B website – here’s what the description DOESN’T say:

    Produced entirely by hand using
    vintage (super old) printing equipment,
    Zeichen Press creates this letterpress
    design exclusively for us in their
    Minneapolis studio. Actually, they call
    it a studio but really it was once the
    family garage – an issue that nearly
    cost the owner (Fran Shea) her marriage,
    and more importantly, the garage.
    I mean, studio. Using a centuries-old
    manual printing method, they set salvaged,
    antique type by hand in limited print runs
    to give the work a one-of-a-kind quality
    that feels both modern and classic.

    °°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°
    They edited that copy down to the nub! But I suppose they know best.

    Have a look at these photos: GASP! They make me want to buy one of my own prints!

    rb-alphabet_529196_10erb-parsons_938057_10e-450x300

    December 27, 2009
  • The strong would survive the winter. The weak would, of course, be eaten.

    the-strong-would-survive-th

    The Long Winter is the true tale of a Minnesota family surviving one of the most brutal Winters in our recorded history. Trapped in the house – day after day after day – the blizzard makes it impossible to see out the window or even walk out to the barn without getting lost. Good ol’ Pa rigs up a rope to follow, he is always coming up with some creative solution! Ma follows that rope because Pa finds himself trapped in a ditch by the creek. The wood pile dwindles to nothing and the family is forced to twist hay into little bundles – they would burn these in the cast-iron stove to heat their little house. … Tough, brown bread is the only food left to eat.

    Or is it?

    What if that was on the jacket flap? I’d totally read that book.

    December 24, 2009
  • It’s time for Christmas rejects!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5SH1j1luFOw&feature=related

    Gosh, that’s a scary movie! Those poor misfit toys… the choo-choo with the square wheels, the pistol that shoots jelly, the effeminate jack-in-the-box…  I think the jack-in-the-box and that little dentist-elf would make a cute couple.

    Okay, so I keep trying to design something to print on these FIVE THOUSAND BEVERAGE COASTERS that we have lying around. I guess no one cares about preserving the shine and luster of their finished furniture.

    I think that’s barbaric.

    Maybe they think it sends the wrong message? I don’t. I think it’s perfectly acceptable to booze it up through the 12 days of Christmas. In fact, it is acceptable all year round IF you set your drink on one of our beverage coasters. (Was that some sort of plug?? Yes. Here’s a link: AND here’s one I designed just for Touchpoint Retail. It has the recipe for a candy cane martini right on it. Isn’t that handy?? coaster-for-touchpoint-450x229

    They decided to go with a card design from the Zeichen Press line but JUST TO BE DIFFICULT (I mean, sui generis.) they had us print it on an oversized SQUARE coaster. But I must admit, it’s pretty darn nice.

    touchpint-coaster-card-fron

    touchpoint-coaster-card-bac

    December 18, 2009
  • Two-timing ZP

    But I LOVE you Zeichen Press! I do. It’s just that Tanek has something (money) that you don’t have. Does that sound shallow? It’s not, I swear. It’s not just the money. They make me coffee. AND they tell me I do good work. You just sit there and take. And take and take and take – a word that comes to mind is “relentless.” But not in a bad way. Did I mention they’re architects? I know! Restaurants, retail, residential… Wait, did I mention restaurants?… Of course you had to know, the signs were everywhere. Remember when I made those Tanek paper dolls? tanek-paper-doll-inside-card

    Or that 4-color halftone?

    tanek-card-untrimmed2

    Wait, that was just last week. Anyway, I’m totally NOT breaking up with you. I’m just going to be seeing them too. But that’s cool, right? Don’t be so selfish.

    **Editor’s Note: What does this mean??? Zeichen Press is just doing some marketing for Tanek.

    December 13, 2009
  • Just a Christmas Card

    No big deal.

    Just a photoshopped-four-color-halftone-letterpress-printed Christmas Card.

    Jen and I were like, “Oh, that’s cool. For a Christmas card.”tanek-card-untrimmed2

     

    December 10, 2009
  • No Coast 2009, Sleestacks and ANOTHER Doppelganger

    WHEW! What a weekend!

    First of all, Amanda came to my house to do my hair.

    She did.

    Shut up.

    I totally care about how I look. It seemed strange to look so beautiful AND carry 500 lbs of cards from a loading dock to a folding table. But I did it for the kids. Jen and I have worked out a system of communication that really facilitates a speedy set up: Jen orders me around like some sort of slave and I stifle sobs behind my Crying Scarf.

    There was another letterpress company about 10 feet away from us and we had to fight to defend our turf. Zeichen Press ended up winning because we have better dance moves and we bribed the judges with Bazooka gum.

    I figured out something pretty important on Saturday morning: I look like a Sleestack.

    fran-sleestack

    sleestack-207x300

    OH! Another thing that was pretty amazing: That dapper gent from one of our new cards actually bought the card that he is on!

    I hope she likes thoughts that count. Letterpress printed on recycled paper. Comes with coordinating envelope and packaged in cellophane sleeve.

    thoughts-that-count-real-ma

    I love a handsome man with a wallet full of cash. (Do you hear me, Kenny?!)

    Let’s see… oh, yes.. the show was jam-packed and we made gobs of moola. I mean, we spread the joy of the season through letterpress goodness.

    Here’s me laughing at one of my own jokes:fran-laughing-no-coast-2009

    And here’s Jen endlessly fussing over a display:jens-arms-arranging-cards-2

    I almost forgot to share this bit of news: Somebody actually stole an entire stack of these:I'm still stalking you. Letterpress printed on recycled paper. Comes with coordinating envelope and packaged in cellophane sleeve.

    What the???

    She must be a professional stalker.

    December 7, 2009
  • Mr. Heidelberg… you RASCAL!

    If all goes according to my master plan, 2,500 pounds of love will soon be mine.

    2,500 pounds…

    That’s one of these:

    austin-mini-cooper-sport-re

    Or two of him:

    alg_heaviest_man

    Are you intrigued??

    heidelberg-logo

    November 22, 2009
  • There Is No Turning Back

    The new logo has been crafted of copper and is ready for printing.

    …But who are those people supposed to be?? And why does the woman wear her hair as if it were 1986?? Only I know the answers to these mysteries and I have just boarded a train headed for Zermatt.

    zeichen-press-new-logo

    November 17, 2009
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