• The Big Picture

    This is the face of a girl who got a globe for Christmas the year before. A girl determined to prove to everyone how much she needed; NAY, deserved the Lite-Brite. fran-lite-brite

    Santa would never make that mistake again. 

    This determination guided the girl for a lifetime, nothing would stand between her and her singleminded fixations. Fran etch a sketch

    NOTHING.

    fran-covered-in-kittens

    One of the latest obstacles were some pesky illustrated creatures 45510_frog_concertwho needed to be removed so one frog could fulfill his God-given right to sing Wayne Newton.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LRPILZS1hc8

    And sing he did. 

    darling-danke-schon

    Yours for only $4.50! (SOON.)

    darling-frog

    October 21, 2016
  • Slightly Different

    Usually bragging is reserved for Facebook, family newsletters, and prison cells. But showering has made me feel fancy and solitary confinement has made me such a blabbermouth!
    SO behold our new bathroom:bathroom-newMillie wanted to show off the bathroom but she isn’t tall enough to open the backdoor.squirrel-millie-wordsToo bad we re-screened that door!

    Did that squirrel even know he/she was the color of my new grout?? I’m kidding! I’m sure he/she did!

    Speaking of Dove Gray™ grout, (WERE WE??) I made a new card. Intern #1 said it was Mom Humor. I told her to go to her room.an-elephant-never-forgets

    October 11, 2016
  • Copy. Paste. Repeat. Copy. Paste. Repeat. Copy. Paste. Repeat. Copy. Paste. Repeat.

    Have I mentioned how much Millie The Dog one-dog-named-milliebarks at anything and everything within a 500 foot perimeter of our house? Mailman, delivery-person, solicitors, neighbors, guests, the kids, trick-or-treaters, my mom… We’ve talked a lot about it and she feels super responsible for alerting us – I told her that we really don’t need that kind of help, BUT WE DID. SHE WAS RIGHT. SHE’S ALWAYS RIGHT.

    SO, my driveway was full of a dumpster filled with bathroom remodel debris, Millie was having a staycation with a friend, AND SOME JERK CLIPPED THE LOCK ON OUR SHED AND STOLE MY BIKE.cut-lockAnd he threw the lock in the dirt like some sort of criminal.

    AND THEN, the loser (no judgment) tried to sell MY bike on a site called OfferUp.com.img_3265

    But he is as slippery as an eel wrapped in a banana peel, and disappeared INTO THE NIGHT. Police have been alerted, prayers to St. Anthony have been said. I asked St. Anthony if he could forward my prayers onto the Patron Saint of Stolen Goods and he told me to go back to sleep and stop Googling escutcheons for the new bathroom.

    FINE.

    While I wait for my miracle, I spend days mindlessly migrating ALL of the content from the Zeichen Press site to THE NEW Zeichen Press site. DON’T WORRY, you won’t even be able to tell the difference because we wanted to spend a lot of money on something that nobody notices.

    OH, and Jen got some new/old cutslittle-man-in-cutsso I made a Father’s Day Card out of that little man.go-to-bedBACK TO MIGRATING/WEEPING.

    September 22, 2016
  • Hygiene Tester

    I did the math and figured out that two toilets MINUS one toilet EQUALS one toilet. And one shower MINUS one shower EQUALS zero showers.

    I desperately yelled that equation to the boys during my bathroom demo, but they pretended not to hear me.boys bathroom demoI only gave birth to them to provide me with free manual labor. Ha! Who’s laughing now, boys??

    Anyway, who needs a shower??Arnie GrapeOR a bath??bathroom mid-project.smallI barely do.

    And as soon as all of my family and friends get back from being out of town for a month, they’ll tell you the same.

    Here’s a new birthday card/fantasy:Happy Bidet

    September 5, 2016
  • Jenmas Eve!

    Everyone celebrates Jenmas Eve differently.*I* like to go to Hot Plate SANS Jen to eat a Mexican Omelet surrounded by a gallery of paint-by-number masterpieces.

    Hot Plate wall

    YEARS AGO, Jen (carefully) slaved away over *her* masterpiece and it sits atop a shelf of knick-knacks in Cape Cod. 

    knick knack shelf cape cod jen made thisShe was so dedicated! 

    I bet she knew that someday I’d repay her in birthday cards.

    dog person crazy cat lady

    August 25, 2016
  • Will Design 4… White Italian Cararra Marble Hexagon Tile

    The Art Licensor (RSVP) asked us for some birthday cards and because I love to work/need money, I made nine. I won’t bore you with the details/need to get back to listening to my new podcast (My Favorite Murder).

    Here are a few… Will they choose any???

    Stay tuned.

    rsvp.2.self medicating rsvp.i buried rsvp.your birthday called rsvp.birthday cake.one piece

    Thank you, Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark. I can’t wait until Alexis Stewart and I meet you in person!

    August 16, 2016
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  • Oh, YOU again.

    I’m not sure if he was gently curb-stomped, or he bit into a fresh apple. Either way, he lost his front teeth.happy birthday no nailed it

    October 8, 2015
  • Stamp-Lickin’ So You Don’t Have To

    Do you fantasize about a service that would lick your stamps (and mail awesome cards to a list of people in your address book)??

    YOU DO??

    Have you heard of Postable??

    POSTABLE logopostable grab how it worksDid I mention that there are Zeichen Press cards in their line?? (NOT letterpress printed, BUT STILL.)Merdankcias postableprinting and mailing circle tenderlyNow there really is zero excuse to NOT send a card IN THE MAIL.

    *Stay tuned: Postable will be adding MORE Zeichen Press cards this week.*

    WAIT, I didn’t mention the most important part:

    September 28, 2015
  • Groucho Marx + Turkey = FUNNY

    Hoohoo! I’m laughing already!

    More for RSVP:rsvp.revised.turkey where

    September 19, 2015
  • WOOT.

    Does Jen hate letterpress printing SO much that I have to create and license all of the art and farm it off to art licensing companies??

    Maybe.

    The latest for RSVP:rsvp.weird honeymoon.front and inside.grabrsvp.woot.front and inside.grabI know one thing for sure. ONE THING. Jen would really hate to print these multi-colored designs. She makes me live in a monochromatic world. But see how I defy?? FIVE colors??

    FIVE.

    And now they want more cards! FINE.rsvp.chanukah.sneeze.front and insideI’m such a rebel.

    September 12, 2015
  • So NOT Letterpress

    Tanek demanded a new website, and who am I to argue?? tanek. index page.harvestor grabI just do what I’m told.

    I designed/art directed it and the good folks at Carney, made my wishes their command.I dream of JeannieObserve the fancy bells and whistles!

    Rollovers… PDF Downloads… Video Portraits…

    And observe what you WON’T observe: My own, personal, Content Management System.tanek CMS grabIt’s okay to cry. It’s beautiful.

    September 7, 2015
  • Tradition Dictates So I Don’t Have To!

    Did I even see Jen on her birthday last week??

    Hmm, I don’t think so… But I still made her a card because my love for her just bubbles over and soils the stovetop with a sort of gravy that becomes crusty and has to be scraped off months later with steel wool and maybe a knife.

    Whew!

    That’s a lot of love!CATSUPGET IT?!?! CAT-SUP???

    Omg, it just doesn’t stop over here!

    August 30, 2015
  • Put a Cat On It

    Do you need to sell something? You do??

    PUT A CAT ON IT.kitty sweatshirtThat sweatshirt is not to be worn ironically and can be yours for a mere $65.

    But really, it’s not even realistic. What sort of galaxy is full of white kittens and multi-colored roses??

    And where’s the wine and unicorn??

    All of those adorable kittens in space DID inspire a graduation card. Don’t ask me why. DON’T ASK ME.may the road rise to meet you.better

    August 23, 2015
  • What’s A Gal Gotta Do??

    Oh, *I* know!BE BOLD PRINT

    No problem.
    August 13, 2015
  • BE A WOMAN

    Don’t tell Blockbuster Video, but I still have a VHS copy of Alive in my attic. Alive screen grabI just love survival dramas. *I* survived the heat last week, it was pretty dramatic… But I ate no one, despite feeling very hungry. To celebrate, the Intern and I set some type.BE bold lock upAND THEN I wrote/designed more cards for RSVP, deadline is TOMORROW. rsvp.snail mailNo big deal. Chosen card(s) just go into the Major Supermarkets.

    August 2, 2015
  • ART Licensing

    ART, I say!

    ART!

    RSVP asked me for some new art, SPECIFICALLY for 16th birthdays, BUT stay away from the subject of driving?

    Um, ok.

    How about the subject of dog poop?rsvp.dont step inI KNOW this is a derivative of MY OWN card.dont step inAND a card I made for ANOTHER Art Licensor. Recycled Paper Greetings.

    They also asked for some Wedding Cards… Maybe I’ll say something about flatulence, MAYBE I WON’T.

    July 24, 2015
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